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Do I really belong here?

By: chalojai | Posted Dec 09, 2013 | The Art of Living | 826 Views

Last week,I had the Annual Direction Seminar in my office. All the centres from all over Bangalore participated in this event. It was a great opportunity for learning and reflecting what we did in last one year. This year was quite eventful,as this year Bangalore centres became operational. To celebrate the success,a party had been arranged. During the seminar,I was quite fine. The problem started from the time I reached the party venue. What happened next, today I am going to narrate.


I am quite an introvert,not only my friends but my mom also says the same. Even I call myself an unsocial element sometimes. In childhood days,when all of my friends used to play,I used to spend the entire time sitting on a window seal,carrying a storybook on my lap.During college days,I preferred spending time in library rather than canteen or stadium. I don't claim that I have that much knack towards reading,but the world of books seemed much real to me rather than the world outside. This is the reason I became so impractical! Well,we are going away from the subject again.So let's not waste time any more.


The time I reached the sky lounge,it was almost 8. Our office car dropped us at a signal from where we needed to cross the road. One of my colleagues,very young and very innocent was with me. I take care of her as an elder sister when her hubby leaves her with me.Her name also suits her a lot,Naveena. She was standing there,clutching my hand,when suddenly she pointed at the toy store and gasped, "Doremon! Can I go and have a look?" Opposite to us,there was a huge toy shop filled with numerous stuffed toys. As I had to cross the road,somehow I stopped her and hurried to the other direction. But my heart went with her wish,do we really need to go? Why can't we spend some time at the toy shop which we like so much? I have been to pubs and discs before but couldn't enjoy it. I have a feeling that people go there to get rid of boredom or some other stress,but finally end up with more stress for next day. The effect of ambience and alcohol wears off very fast,next day you feel like a squeezed sponge. I was not quite happy because I was going to experience the same again. But at a party where right from your president of the company to all your colleagues-all are present,you can't be a spoilsport any more. I decided to leave soon and Naveena also agreed to the same.


I needed to change from the formal dress to something casual. It took me just 5 minutes to get ready in Ladies' changing room. Others were still busy applying make-up when both of us were ready and left for the sitting area. The ambience was great,with soothing music and attractive lighting. But we found no place to sit as the male members were already occupying the best seats and ordered for their drinks. It was surprising that not a single one offered us a seat. They were too busy in their own world,busily discussing the statistics and plans. Both of us were feeling quite out of place. To our rescue, girls finally arrived and pushed all of those men away from the sofas. Seeing us standing at a corner,our admin-in-charge came running and dragged two chairs for us. We tried to strike conversation with others,but all were too busy,either checking dress or make-up,or discussing about theirs and others' looks. Finally it got so boring that we got up and came to another corner. People,after few pegs already became silent and got lost in their own world. We looked at each other helplessly. From there where we were standing,that toy shop was still visible. Looking at that,Naveena sighed and commented," It was better being there,why did we come? Do we really belong here?"


Her question,her vacant eyes and her helplessness showed me something. This was the question bothering me from the moment I heard the venue for this party. These are the places and events were people are so much self centred. Either they discuss about business or try to get some benefits from others. Actually this is also a part of business in a mask of pleasure. Everybody has a secret desire in heart,nobody shows the real face again. Let it be showing one's presence or pleasing the boss,obliging his wish by coming to the party.or trying to get some resources or similar things,or extracting some info during casual conversation. Do I really belong to this world? Nah,too complicated for a pea-brained person like me!


I always tried to be simple in life. All these drinks and dance and eating costly food are not that appealing to me. I preferred standing at one corner,watching night life and endless streams of vehicles passing through,the distant signboards and the hot air balloon floating at the distance. Did I totally dislike the party then?No,not at all. The happy face of our all-time grumpy boss on the dance floor brought a smile on my face. I kept checking time to time if all the associates are feeling comfortable,if anybody needs anything. I helped others to get a seat when they got tired of dancing( for me,except or admin boy nobody cared to do so). Even I ordered soft drinks for few girls when they were feeling nauseated in that stuffy lounge bar. I started playing the host soon,in which my irritation and the awkwardness moments before evaporated soon.When the time came for dinner,I showed them the way to the terrace restaurant where a lavish buffet was spread and took care that everybody eats properly. Nobody gave me this charge,but I felt happy this way. From then,till all the girls were put in cabs and started towards their homes,I kept contact with them and once I got the news that everybody reached home safely,my responsibility was over for the night,at 1 am!


A great lesson I learned on that day. When the surrounding is not favourable,try to find happiness in that. Who says you have to go along the situation even if you don't like it at all? If you don't want,don't do that. But if you look carefully,you will see many things are left unattended which needs to be taken care of. Take those responsibilities. People may not praise you all the time, but at least you will get the satisfaction that your time is not entirely wasted. At least you were able to make somebody comfortable,that's enough.


At last I must say,I cast the path for my li'l sis so that next time even if I am not around she shouldn't feel lonely or lost. My effort wasn't unnoticed,either. Somebody really appreciated that,and that night I made some great friends. If you do things for people selflessly,they will obviously notice and reciprocate that. So,what are you you seeing in my behaviour,huh? Some hidden agenda? Nope.maybe I didn't belong to that place,but finally,I made it MY place. Try this,life will look better.


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