Nov 01, 2004 10:02 PM
3475 Views
(Updated Nov 01, 2004 10:05 PM)
The devil is here with another masterpiece….in classical devil’s style.
So why do your write at MS? Ask yourself….what makes MS successful? what makes it so addictive?
You see MS is like a Karoke bar….it’s a open place. You don’t need to be a star writer…a known writer to be famous. Like in a Karoke bar everyone sings….right from a good singer…to a bathroom singer whose pure cacophony want to lock him the bathroom. And people either appreciate or deppricate the singing. Either ways there is an open forum.
MS is a site for all those part time writer…pseudocritics….semi-fiction people etc. They try to bring there suppressed ego of writing out on this site. It’s a vomitus of peoples collected bile of writing bug. But where does it lead to….if you spend time writing a thing….you want it to be read. You want your numbers in 100 and not pathetic 10s and 20 s. How do you do that…learn from the devil.
Why the devil? you see devil was a writer just like you before this. He wrote great stuff…clean stuff…people never read those…now devil has reinvented himself as someone more cynical…he is now famous. So follow me and sell you soul to the devil.
Humor
No humor….no chance of reaching about 50 read….period.
Controversy
Now amrita has an amrit of controversy flowing in her veins. So is read. More important she is discussed. The more noise you create ….the more against the stream you go….the more you are hated….the more comments you get in your review., .the more you get read! This is a hard fact of not only MS but fact of life. Good guys finish last….and it’s a hard fact…and it is true. So I suggest write on alternate views….write on hot topics…write keeping your ethics and morals aside….and you would be famous!
Choice of Topic
Has anyone seen the movie Run Lola run. Okay how many have even heard of it…what about Swas….nope…any takers? Why am I making a refrence to them…read ahead. Now there are writers who have written very good review on these topics….and have got a pathetic response…why …because they have written on topics no one wants to read about. Write on these topics and I am sure you would get more hits if you wrote a obituary. I am sure you would find a few takers…the usual suspects…Cousin2 and Rosea who would blindly give you a VU with out reading a thing. Maybe a comment or two by someone…but it’s a waste. Take a hot topic …like Five Worst reviewers on MS. I am sure even if you write “Twinkle Twinkle little star” here ….even that would give you a truckload of comments and ratings.(and I am sure you would get a better rating than I got….keep the names out and you are VU in this strange world ….!)
Timing
You see as I understand, there are two types of people on MS. One part of the community who are bored from life….writers themselves and who escape from the world on MS. They want to read good stuff, …write good stuff and are here for fun not seriously doing a market survey. And then there are non member people….who most likely drift to MS when they make a search on a review on a product and google and end up coming to MS. The first catergory would comment and rate you…the second would read you! Work for the second one too at times. I will tell you how.
You see Indian idol is just launched….and sure people are talking about it and ready to listen about it. Now if you right it on now…you would get a lot lot many hits ….but when you think about it retrospect long after the series is over who would want to read about it eventhough your piece is a masterpiece?
Another hot spot where timing is required is about movie. Here if you are the first or second person to write a decent review on a well anticipated movie you would get a great number of viewers eventhough you have written shiet. There is a guy called review_preview or something on MS. Now this guy writes only about movies….and his reviews are pathetic. I mean they are so bad that I am sure he hasn’t seen the movie! All he probably does is that he goes to a site like Indiafm.com or something reads the critics review there which comes on the day the movie releases and mixes a few words and give you a review, unethical you say…but who cares it works. Do something like this…see which movies are released today.read a good critics review and be the first one to write about it and I am sure you would cross 500 mark easily with that. Veer Zaara is coming up…lets see how many do that. This one will gurantee more than 1000.
Yes this is in a bad spirit of MS, but you see if you do a thing like this once you get noticed and this review becomes your gate. If it’s really humorous or thoughtful people…those who never even knew you existed would read your other reviews. That’s how the system works.
Consistent
If you are a movie critic….write only movie stuff, if you are a humor writer…keep it that way., if you write fiction as reviews…again don’t change. Keep on USP, ‘being a god writer’ is not enough, you must be ‘being a good writer on movie’ type. Why? because you audience recognizes you by that, that is your USP and that’s what works. If nikamma were to write a crying piece…who would want to read, if Muneed were you write on cricket….I wouldn’t care to read about it…if spookay wrote a serious article .why should I read that? Be consistent….experiment to find your poison and once you find it…keep it that way. Afterall who would want to see Mallika Sherwat as Mother India, the audience recognizes as a whore…keep it that way, that’s her USP.
Baba gyan
Now even after reading a generilzed thing people will not learn ….so let me so some direct marketing. Some people need to get to Baba Gyani Devilji and they would be given the following advice.
Cool_tanmay: baba, I have been in MS for sometime now…but my numbers are very weak. What do I do
B: First of all you need to work in that photo of yours. It looks like Karl Marx took a rebirth and got himself clicked in front of a red communist flag! Get a good photo …do some hair style or something. Secondly make your title catchy and don’t put it in caps…sounds like you are shouting. A title like Tanmay’s Tigers sounds like Tamil Tigers….a complete turnoff.
Rahulbhilwadi: Baba I have been around but still a virgin. I haven’t been discovered …I haven’t had my cherry popped what do I do?
B: First of all you don’t need to have your real name as id. Sadly you are not blessed with a very good name. Bhilwadi reminds me of a billadi!(which means a cat in Gujarati) Get a swanky new name like ‘Tribalgarden’(Bhil=tribal, wadi=garden!) Secondly your titles are like tribals too. “Jhingalala hoo!” I mean even if someone puts a gun on my head even then I would not choose that as a title! Thirdly smiling in a photo doesn’t hurt….i know you don’t endrose closeup but you don’t endrose “Dr Lips” either!
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