Dec 29, 2010 07:09 AM
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What to write about a film which is not actually a film. Tees Maar Khan is a shirt which you wear, use and throw once the color fades away. It’s a juice can which goes straight to the garbage bin once all the drops are transferred inside your body(please don’t read this out of context). It’s a McDonalds burger which you consume and forget about. It is what Housefull was and Sajid Khan’s next film will aspire to be.
Enough of Siddhuisms, this film is a commodity meant to be used and thrown, rather than an art to be admired and remembered.
“Mindless Comedy” is the term almost all the reviews have used for this flick. However, it would be naive to think that all comedies are mindless. It’s an entirely different and rather unfortunate matter that these days “comedy” and “mindless” have become synonyms. And films like TMK are not doing this difficult genre any favour by wholesaling one defective product after another with an aim to fill their coffers.
Comedy is an art difficult to master. It is much more difficult to make people laugh than it is to make them cry. Why else do you think Chaplin is still so popular? He was a rarity. Even Bollywood had its fair share of healthy comedy, with films like Golmaal(not the Rohit Shetty one), Jaane Bhi Do Yaaron and even Andaz Apna Apna.
The comedy in those films had a purpose. The characters weren’t trying hard to make the audience laugh neither were they overacting, slapping people around or cracking jokes about sardars and gays. There used to be a story, a gripping screenplay and well thought out dialogues. Comedy came out of the situations that the characters ended up in, rather than characters doing comedy for the sake of comedy.
But now it’s the SAB TV generation, the generation of loud ham acting, simplistic plots and even more simplistic treatment. The definition of comedy is vastly different now than what it used to be in the Hrishiksh Mukherjee era. Comedy has regressed as a genre rather than moving forward and TMK is a prime example of that.
TMK follows the safe route, and it’s this monotonous approach which goes against the film. The tried and tested formula of getting a star(Akshay Kumar), putting an item number which becomes a hit before the movie releases, and having a gag show in the name of story, well the formula was there alright, but this is cinema and not a science lab. Formulas don’t work, and they shouldn’t.
It won’t be incorrect to call TMK a more glamorized version of “Comedy Circus” or “Laughter Challenge”. The only difference being that here the gags are performed by well know stars rather than television strugglers.
Getting Akshay Kumar is the first step towards giving a hit, or so the analysts say. He has got more box office collection than any other star. And the fact that he’s over hyped too about his so called comic skills(I wonder till when can he keep on selling his comic timing, in the name of grinning widely and saying the dialogues with a kameenapan which has become his stereotype) must have given Farah Khan enough hope & courage to go ahead with the film without actually a need for the story. Her husband Shirish Kunder has written the story as per the credits. If Farah can mistake this for story, then I’m sure she can also mistake masturbation for intercourse.
I didn’t like Main Hoon Na, but Om Shanti Om was good(seriously). However, making TMK after OSO is like having an erectile dysfunction despite having Viagra. What was the fat woman thinking? Farah Khan fans please take a hike, if you have problems with my calling her fat. Calling her that is as true as calling Katrina beautiful, because she actually is and sizzles the screen in Sheila Ki Jawani. She needs a good director to bring out her acting prowess(like Prakash Jha did in Rajneeti), but Farah simply wasted her just because she had a purse as big as her stomach(for bad films) to be able to cast her in the first place.
Yes I am making fun of Farah, but so what? Didn’t she make fun of Shahrukh, Amir, Manoj Bajpai, Danny Denzongpa, Danny Boyle and others in TMK? Oh and many more countless others in OSO(poor Manoj Kumar Jee!). However, the biggest fun was poked at us audience, it was like saying, “see I can take you all for a ride, by giving such substandard products, and yet laugh my way to the bank”. She has insulted my intelligence and I’ll return the honours through this review.
Akshaye Khanna manages to make you chuckle occasionally but then the lad is a good actor. His “Day Ho” act(poking fun at Slumdog’s Jay Ho) is indeed funny and I hope he gets a performance oriented role soon. Those who have seen him in “Gandhi My Father” will know what I mean.
As if this much mediocrity wasn’t enough, Farah also decides to rope in Salman Khan for an Eid item number. Poor old woman must have thought that now her film is a guaranteed hit, with two stars being there. But if the cancer is at last stage, even 200 doctors can’t save you. The weak(non existent) script was the cancer here, which destroyed the whole film.
Depending on just star value, and ham acting to make you win the race, is like depending on just water and sugar to make a cup of tea. Where is the tea powder my dear lady? Where is the story? The tight screenplay? Didn’t care enough for it? Then please don’t mind if audience spits this bad cup of tea into the gutter rather than gulping it down their throats.
I’m writing after a very very long time so please excuse some of my distasteful similes and metaphors. But what the heck! A bad film deserves a bad(or rather a badly written) review.
And to you Mr Sajid Khan who said “I gave the first hit of the year(Housefull) and my sister will give the last”, I wish TMK had even a single joke, half funny as this!
