Jun 10, 2017 04:41 PM
10957 Views
(Updated Jun 10, 2017 04:51 PM)
I just read this book few days back. First of all, I'll give you a brief summary of the book, and if you are one of those who thinks that, reading a book is not their cup of tea, you can get the same wisdom by reading it, as you would have got if you read the book.
Book summary:
You must be wondering, why the title of this book is "Men are from Mars and women are from Venus:. According the author men and women are completely different, like the specifies from two different planets, and that is why this title.
Author says that, a woman tells her problem to her man, just to get empathy and validation, however man always want to fix the problem and starts providing the solution to the problem. This start the argument. as the woman thinks he does not listen to and love her, on the other hand man thinks that she does not appreciate his help. So when a woman tells you the problem, just listen, so compassion and don't give unsolicited advice.
Author says that, on the other hand a woman always tries to improve the man. She feels that by doing that, she is caring, while the man thinks she is trying to control her. And a man does not like to be controlled and the fight begins. Example: Keep your shoes in the shoe rack, dry the Bathroom floor after taking bath etc. So women should understand that men don't like it, and try to refrain from it.
Author says that, Men and women differently cope with stress. A man in stress wants to be left alone in his cave, their he will think to find a solution, and if he can not find the solution, he will try to forget the problem by getting engaged in some other activities, like watching TV, reading newspaper etc. While a woman in stress, she just want to talk about her problem and wants her partner to listen. If her partner listens, she feels overwhelmed and understood.
Author says that, as rubber band can be stretch and contract, a man wants to be leave alone for some time and he comes back to her partner after some time. So women need to keep patient during this phase and let their partners to comeback themselves. A woman periodically feels happy and sad. So men should not try to find reason behind her sudden happiness and sadness. They should just accept it.
My verdict:
If you ask me that, should you read this book or not? My answer would be a Big'No'. This book is a great example of sexual stereotyping, and gives a wrong message to the society. The psychology of Men & Women explained in this book may or may not be true for an individual. Whether its a man or woman, there way of thinking and behaving, varies person to person. A person's personality depends on many a factors like his or her upbringing, social environment(Which changes with time), life experiences, demographic location, economical condition etc. Also this book was written in 1992. Since then, woman status in the society has drastically been changed and so as their personality. Now a days both men and women are working. Many of the today's working couple do not think or behave in the way as standardized in this book. Tactics explained in this book are, irrelevant in today's scenario, and not going to help in your married life. Instead you will become skeptic and will start judging your spouse as per typical behavior mentioned in this book. An that will only worsen the situation. Instead of reading this book, just try to understand the personality of your spouse and behave accordingly, that will lead you to a happy and prosperous marriage life. Finally, I wish you a very happy and prosperous married life!
