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Where there is a will there is a way
Nov 20, 2001 04:16 PM 3806 Views
(Updated Nov 20, 2001 05:27 PM)

This review is particularly directed at the Indian audience. I am considering the fact that many a times we in India do not know that we are depressed and ignorance leads to many other complicated illnesses like Schizophrenia, Nervous breakdown, etc



Reasons for depression



In India, the problem which affects most of the youth and the adults is being scared of being an underacheiver either in the field of studies or in their working life. Competition is fierce and expectations are high.


Relationships play a great role in our society. A broken relationship may lead to the first stages of depression very easily. Be it family or friends, when one loses the support system, it is very easy to be lured to the other side. Indian society is built like a support system. Wherever we are, it is sometimes very difficult to survive on our own. We are always secure as long as there is a something to fall back upon, be it career, family, loved ones, friends etc.


The basic foundation in our mental psyche is laid from our family. This is true all over the world. When we have someone who will not judge us even when we are at out lowest, we can confidently say that we are capable of surviving the worst of odds in our life.


Unemployment is another reason. Presently the recession in the software industry might have pushed many a guys to the limit.


Failure *-  This may mean many things, sometimes it may mean failure to communicate, failure to sustain relationships, failure to reach your own expectations.


Loss of a loved one. This is the most painful situation of all and it is very difficult to cope but I guess there is a solution to everything. even to this tough aspect of life.



Symptoms of Depressions



Certain symptoms which may tell you that your friend or loved one is suffering from depression are:


Having a listless attitude.


No motivation to do anything.


No appetite.


Loss of weight and dark circles under the eyes.


Always being pessimistic.


Always wanting to be alone and not wanting to meet any one socially.


Hating oneself and trying to harm oneself.


Feeling oversensitive, etc.


And last but not the least having a suicidal tendency.



But this is just the beginning. In due course of time, mental depression gives way to physical ailments like body aches, digestive problems, headaches, relying heavily on drugs and Alcohol, etc.



So what can you do to help yourself and your friends?



First YOU have to realize that you have to help yourself more than anyone. You have to want to come out of it . Help will be available in many forms. You will see it only if you want to.


Temporary relocation This is the best solution yet I have found which has helped my friends, provided you do not drag your past along with you. You must try and find something new in a new place. A new thing to do, a new thing to look forward to. A new place will help you to shift concentration from yourself to the outside world where your innate human curiosity will make you lead life afresh.


Boost your self confidence by maybe doing a general makeover. Go shopping . Try and look good. Do something you like. Think positive. Try and make friends over the net. You will get many people who will be more than willing to talk to you and listen to you.


Relationships Well if you had a hard time with your relationships, its time you take stock and go for a new circle of friends by taking up vocational courses. Don’t brood on something, which is not on your hands. Try and put yourself above everyone else. It may sound selfish but when you can make yourself happy, you can make others happy. If you respect yourself others will automatically respect you. You should realize that you are the most important person in your life.


Keep busy Try and keep busy. I have already enlisted a few options above. Besides vocational courses, you can try joining fitness classes, learn dancing, do some social work, take up teaching small kids, search for a new job, keep a pet if you like animals( animals are known for their undivided love for you which will definitely give you sense of belonging), etc. Being busy is another factor, which keeps all negative thoughts at bay.


Meditation Last but  not the least, you can always try meditation to bring a balance in your mental frame. Many of your problems will be solved when you sit at peace and focus on the inner YOU.


But all these factors have to be complemented. You cannot just meditate, or just keep busy or just relocate. You need to bring all the activities mentioned above to form a schedule which will make you a better person.


For example: You could divide your time as in


Morning: Meditation / exercise / healthy breakfast


Day: work/ vocational course / social work / communicating with people or colleagues/ healthy lunch/


Evening: long walk in a park/ enjoying with family./ if single, renting a movie/ fitness class/cooking if interested/shopping/making creative stuff/calling friends or family if staying away from home/having a hearty dinner/ reading a good novel/ studying stars/ meditation / etc etc


You can help your friends by being supportive and showing them the avenues to different activities with which they can help themselves.



Conclusion



Remember if you want to be a happy human being nothing can stop you . Then again it depends on what makes you happy.  Happiness is relative. It may be expensive or for free. You have to decide what you want and what you can afford. We have a lot going for us. We just need to realize it . Depression is normal but its not incurable.


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