The story of a Bedha Raja. Review on Excise Department

Disclaimer : This is purely a fictitious story and has no semblance to any individuals or organizations of this nation.

Not so long ago, there was a Bedha Raja. He was not so poor man (Bedha in telugu means poor) with the name Raja and was earning a monthly Salary of Rs 10000/- a month when he joined the Govt service of India. He had a greedy wife called Lobha Rani. They were living in a tenanted house with Bungalows around.

She told her husband,” dekho tum to have joined a Gold mine and not Govt service and you have to start your gold quest now else we will be poor forever. You see all the neighbours who have studied well and working abroad and sending dollars.

Bedha Raja did not understand and he replied back, “if you want I will buy you dollar but not in gold.

She yelled him back that if he did not become rich in three months, she will beat him with atta roll , if he still did not do so in six months, she will heat him in Kadai.

Worried about his wife’s daily cat calls, he decided to join a course of MBBS in his office. ( Manushya Budhi se Brashtachar Seekna).What was normally a four year course

(Seniority has high precedence), he ended up learning in six months and became Vasool Raja MBBS.

One day while traveling in Aam admi’s passenger service , the Bus stopped at signal because of breakdown and he was alighted. Then a beggar approached him whom he used to see every day. When he kept on pleading, he obliged him with 20 paise coin. The Beggar got furious and threw the coin on his face-kis jamane ke ho tum, hum panch rupiye se kum nahin lete , yeh to humara last association meeting mein tay hua.

Bedha Raja got insulted and learnt his lesson.

The first thing he did was to pay vasool to his senior MS holder ( Masters in Sleaze) and asks for a posting in one of the major towns on the highway. MSians are masters and know how to collect vasool from under graduates and belong to a Royal Family of Emperors for whom the royalty (mamool) should come from Vasool collectors without shaking their finger from the throne.

Then begins the daily chore of Vasool Raja MBBS on highway. He remembered the Beggar. If a Beggar can demand five rupees, He visualises-then what should be my target. I am no Highway Beggar but a Highway mugger –ab dekho mera tadaka

Day 1: He stops the first truck.Kya license hein.

Sir ,” Malik to daroo peke so rahen hein, my to cleaner hoon.

U see I am RTO Inspector-Give me 500 rupees else I will seize the vehicle

Day 1 collection Rs 5600/-

Day 2: He stops another vehicle fully packed

Where are the papers –what are these goods.

Sir I have the bill challan and all documents. Then unload the vehicle. I am from commercial taxes and want to check as per DC. Sir it will take 5 hours to unload and reload and I have to deliver and I am already late.

Then pay 2000/- and go. The poor fellow obliges.

Day 2 collection : Rs 16000/-.Vasool Raja became very happy.

This continued many days and our man donned the roles of Central excise, customs, IT and all the departments,DRI,CBI which are qualified and approved as MBBS service and his monthly collections exceeded Rs 2-3 Lakhs.

Vasool Raja became a Bhoja Raja soon. He bought a Bungalow in the same colony and his wife became Singari Rani and called all the good Samaritans in the colony for a party where she displayed the Royal collection of 400 sarees, 32 tolas of gold and 111 chapals. One of the woman in the party was MS-ITC ‘S wife who was smart enough to demand few tolas as bait to keep mum.( MS has higher value than MBBS)

Once our Vasool Raja bumped on two Nigereians in their car. This time, he demanded 5000 rupees because they were having brown gold with them. They did not have enough rupiya and offered him 300 USD. Now he understood what dollar meant and went and pleased his Rani showering dollars on her.

On another occasion, he caught a Qualis which was fully loaded with men and machines.

He did not read them this time and demanded another bundle. This time it was Maos who went off with the booty of 50000/- that he had collected that day.

But only after tying him to a Tree in Nanga posture. Bhoja Raja also became a Nanga Raja but still did not learn his lesson after escaping death sentence.

Raja went on to live lavishly and Rani went on partying spree. Liquids and smoke filled all the parties and Rani forgot that she was to give a prince and consumed plenty in all including some brown gold from next catch of Raja.

When they were blessed with a child, God did not bless them with a good one. The child was crippled and mentally retarded and could not walk as well.

But the ways of Raja continued. He finished his MS and became an Emperor as well.

And his son did not become a prince, but a pauper in mind and body.

Thanks for reading.