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20%
1.60 

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Cashcow or Scarecrow ?
Aug 05, 2007 05:25 PM 5444 Views
(Updated Aug 15, 2007 10:44 PM)

Plot:

Performance:

Music:

Cinematography:

[A cash-ual approach ]


[I don’t choose my movies. I only watch movies on Fri & Sat night shows. I watch from my  favorite sofawala seat nos X-21 & 22. If I don’t get those seats I don’t watch the movie. Thus whatever movie is available on these two days with those two seat nos, I watch them. So if it was Red, so be it, if it’s Cash, I couldn’t care less. If I like the movie, I feel good. If it sucks, I write a review quickly. Either way it’s fun.]  This is the last & final explanation.


Cash is a movie directed by the same director of Dus- Anubhab Sinha. Dus was a likeable movie with Pankaj Kapur as Jambal. I expected something like Jambal. What I found? Gambol.


[Story Encashed]


Unfortunately I wasn’t intoxicated enough to decipher even a simple story about Diamonds, nuts, crooks, cops, babes, uncles, remote control gadgets and marked dollars.


Though I could not understand fully, I could gather is it’s about a big diamond originated from India, which was divided into three small diamonds eventually, because you can’t divide a big diamond into three big diamonds.


Cape Town is the place where these diamonds are expected to re-unite under criminal supervision. The job is assigned to top criminal mastermind Doc (Devgan) by a “back from the dead” bad criminal Angad (Suniel Shetty). Surprisingly, Doc appoints & sub appoints few specialists of the trade from India, to steal a painting (why? I dunno). There’s a cash reward (US$ 50mn) for the job plus skimpily clad girls to dance around, in abundance.


Each & every characters had a not so perfect past, and they are gradually cooked in this khichdi- narrated by Zayed Khan to Ayesha-in-business-class-Takia on a flight from Cape Town (or towards it, whatever).


After lot of confusion, action, drama, car stunts, animation, suspense and more confusion the story ends taking lives of bad criminals & few cops while the good crooks come out of the fire- unhurt, unshaven & suave.


All walked to glory. I have cashtraited the story.


*[Cash Deposit]


Animation: Like *Kill Bill & Run Lola Run high fidelity animation is used liberally, for many of the action sequences. Undoubtedly, the animation quality is superior (the filmmaker did the animated Ramayan). It also saves the director from shooting the stunts in real time. If this trend continues, all body doubles & stuntmen would be jobless soon.


Stunts:  Too much of it & at too many places likeDhoom-2. Outstanding car chases, water scooter, parasailing, skateboards, chopper, yacht, Bungee jumps, kick in the air,screech….crash…bang...thud **! Superb stunts are accentuated with spell bounding cinematography & multiple camera angles with action replay. Too many cars- Audi, BMW, Nissan, Merc and many more. A new vehicle was invented for this movie, like a surfboard on small wheels. The driver/ passenger has to lie down flat and it travels @ 100kmpl. This vehicle is useful to plant bombs on the cars. Awesome. Pass me the grass Director.


Laugh : I recall two instances where I laughed. Otherwise, I was seriously busy understanding the story. One, when Doc Devgan narrates how to start a car over cell phone explaining the “gaarrrr- poooo- ghack” technique to Samita. Another was the “dhundla’’ guy, who was explaining the looks of Devgan to Samita & later to the police artist. That dhundla guy was outstanding in his short role.


[Cash Withdrawal]


It’s futile to describe the performances. Major performances were by the animation designer & the stunt director. I will make a feeble try to describe my take on the cast.


There was lot of characters with varying degree of style quotient & looks. So far I was aware about the “out -of-the bed-look”, but this movie helped me derive some more.


Ajay Devgan : Doc is not a doctor, he is actually an Engineer turned criminal but pretends to be a writer husband of a security honcho in Indian Embassy (Samita Shetty). He looks funny and plays with lot of remote controlled toys.


His sported a “ Kajol-will-beat-me-to-death-if-he-sees-me-this-way” look.


Samita Shetty: “Amul-macho” *look. The babe in baniyan. Toned body, stoned acting, honed bra-very, proned to Devgan’s pranks. Alas, she is fooled till the end and still to be continued…


Suniel Shetty: “dunno-how-to-shave-but-have-money” *look. Complete dumb in designer jackets. He was named *Angad. Poor villain, neither does he gets the diamond, nor the money or girl- just bullets.  But the chair with a checkered backdrop, nevertheless was an outstanding & extremely “graphic” scene !


Diya Mirza: “My-new-name-is-Aditi” look. Does not have much to do before getting killed by her lover Angad. She must concentrate on her future roles as kindergarten teacher or a nurse. I will award her as the “most dressed lady of the film”.


Esha Deol: “Am-still-in-the-hangover-of-Dhoom2” look. She is the lass who kicks a*s to get the cash, bash the cops to crash the car to trash. In mini skirt & pony-tail, loved by two men she drove the movie in cars. Gimme my cash back, lady.


Zayed Khan: “Travelling-for-the-first-time in-business-class-with-a-tie” look. A water ski freak who hates Ritesh, loves Esha. Dump him to recycle bin.


Ritesh Deshmukh: “Just-out-of-the-toilet-after-5-days-of-constipation” look. Alternatively can be called as the “Scarecrow” look. He fights with Zayed, trying to look cool. Dump him in recycle bin too & then click “empty”.


*[Music- was there a cash back offer?]


Paisa pheko, Tamasha dekho (title song)- dil mein hai cash, man mein hai cash, _(dash) mein bhi cash etc etc.* The good thing is if you are late in entering the hall, you can miss it. Yeah !


Rehem Karo, have mercy- an itchy bitchy number with a dehydrated item bomb in red hot pants. I have last seen Michael Jackson doing the “-thou shall scratch but thou shall not touch the crotch” act.


Mindblowing mahiya- a fast forwarded track in golden & white combination by Samita shetty. No further comments.


Background score was good, though.


[Still reading....? ]


Oh, you want to know the verdict?


Go watch it if you like comics, cars, Samita Shetty in baniyan, don’t want disturbance created by storyline in between action sequences and song-dance and finally have lawaris cash-in-hand. Else, watch Dus once again.


~uh*~


ps: The title is meaningless. Made an owl of you !


pps: Alternative titles -Cowdung of Cashcow, Cashablanca, Cash-ew  Nuts etc.


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