There was a time when I used to detest HR trainings. Now I realise its always a better option to listen to the "all expenses paid " meaningless jabber of a trainer than to listen to a "ghajini of all trades, jack of none" rant of your Boss. So when a "triple certified" trainer recently offered to conduct a free Meditation session for our benefit, I jumped on to the opportunity.
Let me freely admit that I was looking forward to something of this sort for a long time now. I too wanted to be a Wannabe. I too wanted to own Duplexes, drive around in BMWs, have multiple affairs and use Blackberries. But the more I looked at myself in the mirror, the more convinced I was - of being a Born Loser. No, even worse. I was convinced I was a Nevergonnabe. That too when
everyone else was a Wannabe. And it hurt like hell. It truly did. I was determined to make it change.
The Trainer promised that all of us would be 'Happy' after going through the session. Some 8-10 fellows eagerly encircled her and begged her to begin. She did. But instead of speaking anything she
simply turned around and pressed a button on her Laptop. The speakers quickly came to life.
Welcome to this session on 'Divine Planning'. Dr Sneh Desai youngest winner of India (winner of what ??) will take you through thisrelaxation technique by which you can easily achieve your goals, and work towards your success... (he got the order wrong I suppose).
In this relaxation, you will be going into the Alfa state of mind(sounded impressive, and very very VIP luggage like). So please do not perform the Relaxation while driving a vehicle or working on a machine.
After a sapping day of desultory training sessions, my mind was in no state to go to the Alfa state but I wanted to shake off my Nevergonnabe attitude and make the session count.
Take a deep breath and as you exhale slowly close your eyes and with your eyes closed just focus on your normal & natural breathing process. See how the air is going in and coming out. In & out. Inn & Ouut. Innn & Ooout...
I could hear a few sniggers in the background and was about to laugh but with great difficulty managed to check myself.
Just relax. Relax. Relaax. Relaaax. And now each time as you exhale see how your body is relaxing. From the top of your head to the tip of your toes, let every part of your body relax. Become aware of the different sounds around you. All the sounds are helping you to be much more relaxed.
The only sound I was vaguely aware of was a f**t from a well fed chap who had spent close to an hour on the dining table earlier in the day. No, the sounds around me were anything but relaxing.
And now take a deep breath and as you exhale let your whole body be more lose and relax...As you loosen up your body it will start to relax automatically...
To tell you the truth I was wary of taking a deep breath for the aforesaid reasons but did I have a choice ?? I loosened up my body but it didnt start to relax. It started to sag...
Start to feel the relaxation, start to feel the lightness; the weightlessness in your body. The lightness; the weightlessness is increasing...you can feel yourself light as a feather, just drifting and floating. Juuuuust dddrifting aaaaand fffloating.
You dont give the benefit of a few pegs to a bloke and ask him to go about dddrifting aaaaand fffloating. Bl**dy cruel I call it !
And nowimagine a ten step staircase in front of you which is going downwards. In a moment I'm going to count from 10 to 1 and as I'll be counting from 10 to 1 you'll be getting down the
steps one by one - going much deeper.
10 - see yourself getting down the steps
9 - dheeper & dheeper
8 7 6 5 4 3 - deeper & deeper, you are almost there.
Again suppressed sniggers in the background. This time I had to bite my lips to restrain myself from laughing.
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