Oct 19, 2009 04:46 PM
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Looks like the downturn for Ashutosh Gowatrikar has begun. After watching the monumental epics like Lagaan and Jodha Akbar, one can’t believe it’s the same director who would have crafted a movie like What’s your Rashee! What the movie lacks is everything.
There is no trace of a taut script (explaining why the film’s reels run for as long as three and a half hours), all the sub-plots involving the 12 characters (representing the 12 moon signs) are slackly fitted to form a story which has clichés galore, and the ending just fails to tie the numerous loose ends together.
Here is a snapshot of the “story” for you, that is, if you care to read ahead: Yogesh Patel (Harman Baweja) is breathing in the cool fresh air of Chicago and reveling in its sparkling blue landscapes when he is summoned by his family back in India.
Reason: His family wants to get him married in 20 days following a silly astrological prediction! Now who would agree to such a proposition if it meant the family would get rich lickety spit and would be free of debts owing to this wedding! But our Yogi does concur with his family and the script-writer and stays back to get hitched. In the meantime, he laps up some wisecracks of an anonymous author who writes in his book that there are 12 different types of gals since each of them belong to the 12 moon signs.
And so he agrees to meet up a dozen of prospective brides and see who is the most compatible of them all! The silliest part is that Yogesh’s star sign is never revealed and one really doesn’t know as to why he does end up getting married to one of the gals when there was surely no sign of compatibility or romance or anything to start with. Anyways, we will brush aside that topic and focus now on the twelve kanyas whom Yogesh encounters along the way.
Anjali (Aries) – A small-town gal with a big hunch who snorts and smokes too (to impress the guy)!!! This one is the least graceful of all but who spills the beans to reveal who she is in real.
Vishaka (Taurus) – A bindaas silly lily who acts dottily on purpose (she wants to find out if the guy is interested in her or papa’s money). Really… I thought Taurians are born daft, they don’t have to put on an act! :P
Kajal (Gemini): This gal is all soap and lather…well I mean she is bubbly, and she is a stickler for nonsensical romance…
Hansa (Cancer): Dressed up as a sati savitri, she shocks Yogesh and the audiences by saying that she is not a Virgin!!!
Mallika (Leo): Her hot dance moves makes Yogi’s eyes to pop out of its sockets; but her icy cold talk as she licks her gola and chastises him for not eating roadside food, makes him run in the opposite direction.
Pooja (Virgo): I had to double-check this! Was she a Virgo…you mean a Virgo…Nevertheless, she was the sweetest of the lot….and a doctor too who just can’t switch off from being one…for instance, she checks if Yogesh has leprosy by nearly impaling his wrists!!
Rajni (Libra): A suave, successful business woman who wants to get hitched only for procuring a green card! She is someone who truly believes in the give n take of marriage…lol!
Nandini (Scorpio): Is described by her parents as a shy gal who has not ever stepped into a theatre hall ever….but soon she sheds her inhibitions and a lot of her clothes to reveal her true sexy self…ever wondered where did she get all those itsy bitsy dresses from, she never steps out of her home, no?
Bhavna (Sagittarian): This one was the most confusing character. She acts and dresses up like a Mirabai (expounding her love for Krishna) and soon cosies up to him spouting words like “alingan” and “chumban”….yikes!
Jhankana (Capricorn): She is 15 years old and slobbers when Yogi shoots a question about her educational merits!
Chandrika (Pisces): As Pisceans are, this one is also a dreamer. But she dreams of punar-janm and dancing on hill tops with her beau in tow….a weirdo!
Sanjana (Aquarius): There was nothing particularly spectacular about this one….except for that she speaks with an accent …and somewhere down the film-line forgets to put on an accent, but she is the one who gets the guy and you wonder why!
So, all in all, this is a film that moves at a sluggish pace, has no comic elements, and abounds in disastrous sub-plots (like the extra-marital affair of Yogi’s uncle). The music is however soothing and Priyanka is spot-on when it comes to delivering all the nuances of the 12 characters. Watch it only for Priyanka if you do plan on watching the movie!
