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Forgive me Lord, for I have sinned...
Feb 17, 2004 11:26 PM 19474 Views
(Updated Feb 17, 2004 11:40 PM)

This sigh of remorse comes from core of a convict’s being, who was initially not ready to confess to his crimes. The police department came up with a very innovative way of making him admit his misdeeds. He was forced to listen great songs from Bollywood till his patience ran out. He was subjected to a worst torture ever inflicted on anybody in the history of Police Department. In a special statement release, the Police Chief shared his secret with public in order to curb crime rate. The message was quite clear – “Commit a crime at your own risk, because if you are caught then worst of the fates is awaiting you in police custody”


Here is the list of few songs, which were part of torture session:


Are you ready…Are you ready…Nakabandi…Nakabandi…


Haiya Haiya Haiya ho. Ab to hai fans gaya tu…


hoga kaise udan chhoo. Nakabandi… Nakabandi…


Sridevi, the dancing sensation of 80’s, added glamour to this horrendous song by wearing an equally hideous outfit. Name of the movie was 'Naakabandi'. I am sure if she looks back and chances upon watching this song she would go in exile for next few years.


Thaam…Thaam…zara dil ko tu thaam


Rekha ko dekha tune, neelam ko dekha…


I wish I could complete the song for you, but honestly I fail to remember the right lyrics(As if they were worth remembering). All that I remember is blood s*cking Sridevi(remember her glossy red lipstick?) and Jumping Jitendra dancing/ jumping/ gyrating/ rolling/ exercising on this song.


Ma ma mia, bhom pom…


pyar ki gaadi tez chalaao,


Accelerator aur dabao…


Accelerator sounded like Axilator and I wondered if it was a new part in a car. Another gem from the dancing duo- Sridevi and Jitendra from the movie ”Justice Chaudhary”.


Aa gaya, aa gaya


Halwa waala aa gaya.


Rang jamaane aa gaya,


Dhoom machaane aa gaya.


I felt really sad for Smita Patil who performed with Mithun Disco dancer in the movie ”Dance Dance”. How could she do it? Bad music from an equally bad film. Better lyrics and couplets are written behind the trucks. I think some of the lyricists need lessons from the truck drivers to write better songs.


Kapurthala se aaya hoon,


tere liye laaya hoon,


Orange Kurta Peela Pajama…


I know what you all must be thinking…No I didn’t cook up the song. It is from a movie called “Dance Party” starring Raman Trikha and our very own Nikita Chachi from “Kkusum”. Absolutely nothing was good about the song…lyrics, music, actors, choreography…everything was pathetic.


Mai to preetam ko kar rahee thee tata re,


kaale kutte ne aake mujhe kaata re.


Hey please don’t laugh. This again is not my creation. This jewel is from film 'Gudgudee' starring Pratibha Who Sinha, Jugal Hansraj and Anupam Uncle…Say na something to Anupam Uncle… Poor Anupam Uncle couldn’t even express his anger. After all he is supposed to listen to sweet and oh so cute baby talks. No wonder he has so much of patience.


Tu ru tu ru…tu ru turu…


kahan se karoon mai pyar shuru…


Akshay Kumar trying to act smart and asking Madhu for her permission to “love” her. Suggestive lyrics and provocative actions made this song unfit for public viewing.


Ui amma ui amma… kya karta hai,


ladka ho ke ladki se kyon darta hai


Karishma and Govinda, the deadly(literally) duo performed for front benchers in this song in film ”Raja Babu”. Poornima, the singer adds some of her oohs and aahs making this song even worse.


Chhat pe soya thha behnoi,


mai tanne samajh ke so gayee …


mujhko ranaji maaf karna,


galti mahare se ho gayee.


Mamta Kulkarni added some extra spice to already hot and rotten song from film ”Karan Arjun'. Just watch her expressions. She can put any hooker to shame.


Ladki hai dekho kamaal ki,


baaroodon waali hai paalki…


Kya pant hai, shirt hai,


Kya mast jeans hai.


This grrrrrrrrrrrreat creation is from movie ”Taqdeerwaala”. The producer must have gone bankrupt while making this movie, that he had to catch hold of a street side Tapori to write songs for his movie.


Aa pappiyan, jhappiyan pa le hum,


ankhiyo ke pech lada le hum…


Dil mein hai khalbali,


O meri chulbuli,


Khul ke mile aaj hum…Adipa


I know this tune sounds a bit catchy. But that certainly doesn’t serve as an excuse for miserable performances of Ajay Devgan and Tabu, and horrible direction.


Columbus, Columbus, chhutti hai aayee…


Aao chal ke dhoondhe naya mulk bhai


Sounds a lesson from history. Again the lyricist must have fallen short of ideas, so he simply picked up his kid’s history book, opened a chapter at random, read the first line and used the concept for his song. Wow! Height of creativity. For your information, the song is from superflop ”Jeans”.


Pyar mein dil ka murga bole kukdoo Koo,


I love you…


Rooth ke jaane waali, na ja,


Aaja tu, I love you


Was it Sanjay Kapoor singing for Juhi chawla in film ”Kartavya”. Oh ma, what a way to express love. Will anybody tell me if there has been any research conducted on anatomy of Mr. Kapoor. He is a fine specimen for any medical research. A rooster in his heart… wow.


Tan tana tan tan tan taara…


Chalti hai kya nau se baarah


One of the worst music composers at his worst in one of the worst movies of the year 1996, ”Judwaa”. Ladies and Gentlemen, let me have the honour of presenting Mr. Anu Malik.


Mai ladki hoon po po po…


Tu ladka hai po po po…


Aao hum mil ke kare po po po


Poor Tabu trying to convince herself that she’s a woman and macho Sunil Shetty of his male status. Poor girl(?) is dancing awkwardly in short skirts in ”Hera pheri. I don’t like this song for its vaguely stupid lyrics and because it is an unwanted speed-braker in the quick pace of a very hilarious movie.


Chandi ki daal par sone ka mor,


Taak Taak dekhe neeche ka chor.


Salman Khan in pink pants… Oops. I guess Raman Trikha must have promised him an Orange Kurta Peela Pyjama, and then backed out and desperate Salman donned on his pink pants and danced on streets wooing Rani Mukherjee in movie “Hello brother”.


continued in comments.


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