Charu Sharma: Hello and welcome to Extraaaaaaa Singings. Since we have finally realised that our knowledge of cricket is zilch, we have now moved on to music. After all, who can be better than us to bring to you the best songs of 2003!
Mandira Bedi: Brought to you by Procter & Gamble.
Charu: No, Mandira. We are not Mohammed Azharuddin, so we will not gamble. Well . I think that the best singers of 2003 were Johnny Lever in Chalte Chalte and Sushma Seth and her group in Kal Ho Na Ho. What do you think, Kapil?
Kapil Dev: Er . they singing well . er .(cannot find the right phrase and so, grins as if what he wants to say is engraved on his teeth)
Charu: Well . since Kapil has forgotten to bring the English dictionary today, he won't be able to answer us. Kapil Dev da jawaab nahin.
(Suddenly, the door of the studio opens. A nikamma called Raj Lalwani glares at the trio. He has a gun in his hand. He maniacally laughs and then checks how many bullets he has.)
Raj Lalwani: Aadmi teen . aur goli do . bahut nainsafi hai!
Kapil:(falling to his feet) Sarkar, maine paisa khaaya hai .
Raj: Ab . goli kha .
BANG! BANG!
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In this way, I, Raj Lalwani, won the Nobel Prize for services to humanity by killing the irritants in Extraaaaaaa Singings. However, Mandira Bedi survived due to lack of bullets and an overdose of curves . sigh! I showered the guns on Charu and Kapil, and presented the roses to Mandy.
(Psst! In real life, Mandira's husband's name is Raj!)
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Inspite of having hair flopping all over my forehead and not Charu's mushroom cut, I still managed to replace him as the anchor of Extraaaaaaa Innings. A fat cheque and Mandira and her curves for company . jeena isi ka naam hai . so here are the best songs of 2K+3 .
'Brought to you by Raj Travels, ' says Mandira.
FILMI . VERY FILMI .
Since my friends call me'filmi', let me begin by selecting four of the top ten songs of 2003 from Hindi films.
# 4. Kal Ho Na Ho - Kal Ho Na Ho
Finally, we have a song from a Johar film, which does not have cries of Aa aa aa all the time! Suno Nigam proves that there is more to him than Suraj Hua Maddham and Saathiya. Sublime lyrics by Javed Akhtar get enhanced by the melodious tunes of Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy and brilliant singing by Sonu Nigam. A winner all the way!
Har ghadi badal rahi hai roop zindagi. Chaav hai kabhi kabhi hai dhoop zindagi. Har pal yahan jee bhar jiyo. Jo hai samaa, kal ho na ho.
A tinge of happiness, a pinch of sadness and a dash of introspection into life. Do lyrics get better than that?
#3.Suno Na - Jhankaar Beats.
The hitherto unknown Vishal-Shekhar created magic while composing the music for Jhankaar Beats. Suno Na is brilliantly sung by Shaan. Long in duration and high on melody, this one is a treat.
Dur ho kar bhi, dur tum nahin ho . paas ho lekin, pass kyun nahin ho .
#2. Jaadu Hai Nasha Hai - Jism.
Just imagine the video of this song. Bipasha Basu, who is intent on increasing global warming by shedding her clothes, lying on a beach on the top of John Abraham. Movements follow . turned on?
Now, shut the video out and just listen to the song. Shreya Ghosal's vocals in this song are more seductive than all the semi-clad(or lesser) Bipashas of this world. The tune is haunting and the lyrics, brilliant.
Dekhti hai, jis tarah se, teri nazrein mujhe, mein khud ko chupao kahan .
And the winner is: Tu Aashiqui Hai - Jhankaar Beats.
For once, KK is not screeching and trying to shatter the window panes of his beautiful neighbour(wonder why he usually does that . naughty naughty!). Sung in a beautifully controled voice, Tu Aashiqui Hai is by far, the best song of the year. Picturised in a church(!), this song is the ideal song to sing(if you can!) to that special someone.
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POP GOES THE WEASEL!
Since I love my father, let me nominate the best song of Indipop in 2003!
The Victor: Aksar - Shaan.
The entire year was filled with garish sets and chicks removing their feathers . er . clothes. After a deluge of remixes, came true music at last. I remember meeting Shaan last month during the Indian Telly Awards(Dad works for indiantelevision.com), and he was by far, the most humble person in the entire television industry. No airs and a great voice, Aksar is slow, soothing and non-pretentious.
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BUP! LALOO BHAIYA!
And finally, we come to Laloo Bhaiya's phavret bhashaa . er . favourite language - English.
# 5. Mandy - Westlife.
(Mandira Bedi, who is still beside me is blushing .)
Westlife's latest single may not be a patch on My Love, but the vocals of the'only boy-band where everybody can sing' more than make up for it.
# 4. Where is the love? - Black Eyed Peas.
That's the question I always mutter after being rejected by a pretty face. But, the lyrics of this song are not so frivolous. I just love the lyrics and the beat .
# 3. Aicha - Outlandish.
I hated the song when I first heard it. And grew to like it later, when I heard it live when Outlandish played at Enigma(a discotheque in Bombay) and at the MTV Immies. The group is from varied backgrounds and that shows in their music. The lyrics are nothing to crow about, but the beat is infectious. I particularly enjoy humming this song in front of my lab partner, Ayesha .
# 2. White Flag - Dido.
The haunting voice behind the preludes and interludes of Stan is back. Dido's latest offering is soft, soothing and beautifully penned, with the thought of love being even more lasting than Rahul Dravid at the crease .
J. Lo, get ready to wear your green bathing suit because the Grammies are here and the Grammy goes to . Bring Me To Life - Evanescene.
My chemistry professor calls them effervescence, but that's a different matter altogether. Here's the best English song since a long time. Amy Lee(who is not Brett Lee's sister)'s vocals are haunting and Ben Moody(who is no relation to Tom Moody!) knows how to play the guitar for sure. We have had numerous imitations of the legendary rock and metal bands of yore, but here's the first rock band of substance since Jon Bon Jovi and his troops. Gothic rock at its best, the video is gravity-defying .
By the way, are you wondering why Mandira Bedi, who's sitting beside, me, is so silent? She is brooding over India's loss. If we would have won, I can assure you that she would have been jumping in her spaghetti straps, screaming'Hum jeet gaye, hum jeet gaye!'
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