Jan 20, 2006 09:28 PM
14376 Views
(Updated Jan 20, 2006 09:28 PM)
All of these topics on Living in India vs. Living Abroad made me want to write my review as well... Let me introduce myself. I am a 26 year old ABCD female. I was born and raised in the state of NH, a small country-esque state. My parents came from India about 34 years ago. I am married to a wonderful guy who was born and raised in the awesome city of Bangalore India, but has been out of India for 10 years...
People often times tell me I am more Indian than Indians from India. I speak Hindi fluently, even quite a bit of Punjabi. I can even read and write Hindi. I am a Bollywood FREAK! I have always been one. Every since my first ''real visit'' to India when I was 14 years old, I have been in love with the place...and at that time would say I want to move to India. Everyone in the US would tell me ''You are nuts. It all seems nice for a few weeks.'' Even at the age of 14, it IRKED me no end to hear other Indians in the US (NOT born in the US, but NRI's) who would constantly insult India and say how ''dirty'' and ''smelly'' it was and how ''badmaash'' the people were. HELLO, in that case even YOU are dirty, badmaash, and smelly cause you ARE from there!!! This to me was SO hypocritical.
Anyways, I had gone in between as well, but recently went on a two week trip to Bangalore India with my husband to visit his family. This entire trip has just thrown my life out of balance. I am an attorney here in the US. I make great $$, have a great education, my husband has a great job, we have a nice place, car etc. BUt yet, I have ALWAYS since that age of 14 felt that something in life is missing. Suddenly, the moment I landed in India, I was complete...
Just seeing the Indian people around me...MY Indian people gave me such a sense of ''fitting in.'' I have not faced discriminination at all growing up in the US, but yet, I dont feel like I quite ''belong'' either. Maybe it was that particular city of Bangalore India. It is AMAZING! I mean, the amont of development, perhaps due to the multi-national companies is fantastic. There are several malls like the US, the food is awesome, just having chai on the street rocks, but most of all I enjoy my people.
One thing I realize is that people in India have changed. Parents have moved with time, changed their ideologies, and are open to their kids' ideas. Indian parents in the US, have NOT changed. They are stuck with some warped ideologies of the 1970's or whenever they came from India. But yet, they feel that they are superior and more ''broadminded and honest'' than people in India. Again, the hypocritical attitude...Here, they stand and say that America is the BEST country...They dont like India, but YET they have built a tiny India for themselves in the US!! They dont hang out with Americans. All their friends are Indians. They only watch Satellite channels from India and live on Zee, Sony, Star TV etc. Their lives move with these TV serials. They actually hear American News on Indian News Channels!! They listen to only Indian music. They look forward to dressing up for Indian parties, where all their friends, also dressed up in the new suits and saris they picked up from their last trip to India, COMPLAIN about how dirty India is and how ''badmaash'' and ''two faced'' the people are! Do you see the irony here?
I have developed a VERY different impression of India this time around. A GREAT respect, and a love for the place. All I know, is when I go there, I feel like I truly belong. It has kind of messed me up since I came back... I am having a hard time focusing on work (for example, I am writing this at work!) I keep thinking of ways to go more often..Perhaps through work for a year?? I dont know. But I left a piece of my heart out there...And in turn, a piece of me.
But no one (at least of the parents generation) lets me appreciate the place. The other day, an Auntie asked me, do you think you could live there?? I looked at her and said, ''I don't know. Maybe.'' This threw her off. The bindi-wearing, sari-clad US Auntie couldnt stand the fact that I had said that, and started telling me how lucky I was to be here...I was just on vacation and its different. When I move there, I will face in-law problems etc etc. Ok...If someone asked me what it is like to live in France, I would also say ''I don't know.'' BECAUSE I HAVE NEVER LIVED THERE! So why the problem if I say that about India? Yes, I admit, I have not lived there. I only know what I do from my visits. But why will I sit here and say ''I woud hate living there?'' when I HAVEN'T lived there?? Why such an issue if I say, I like the place? When such an issue if I say I LIKE my Indian in-laws?? Are Indians who moved here just trying to convince themselves that they made the right choices?
You know, perhaps one day, I as an ABCD, will move to India, at least for a year or two. My parents and their friends would freak at the idea, again lecturing me about how manipulative of a country it is, and how dirty it is, and how I will have problems etc etc. But all I know is, that part of me is in India. Let me discover it myself....Realize India has changed. Its not what you left behind. And don't be ashamed to be from India. If you really want to be American, then toss away your Indian clothes, speak only English, make all American friends, throw away your ''Jagjit Singh'' CD's, and get rid of your Satellite dish. And THEN lecture me on how much India stinks...
- PROUD TO BE AN INDIAN, NOW AND FOREVER.
