...........Alas!.....An affair to forget.......... Review on Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna

“ The term personality as used by psychologists, refers to the total behaviour of the individual , but particularly to those relatively enduring and consistent aspects that cause us to resemble others in some ways aand to be totally different and unique in others”………and so the professor droned on and on about “Personality development”(like we care!). All of us were wearing a harassed , glazed look on our faces and just hoping that it soon dawns on the chief guest that we weren’t finding his so called lecture the least bit interesting despite all his efforts to impress us youngsters…………………………..No friends !......you guys and gals aren’t on the wrong page……I am merely comparing the experience of sitting through a boring sermon to the sad and seemingly neverending experience of watching ‘Kabhi alvida na kehna’

The much hyped flick falls flat ……….no two ways about. I am afraid my views may offend staunch fans…but there it is! This flick stinks so badly that I was literally pulling my hair out halfway through it.Even my experience of watching K3G wasn’t nearly this bad ….and that’s saying something about KANK ‘S quality(or rather the lack of it).

I won’t elaborate the story(if one exists in the first place) as all my friends out here have already done an exceedingly good job of it. I will merely mention where exactly this flick falters and fails to satisfy my thirst for good cinema.

Let me be frank friends…..Iam no big fan of Karan Johar…….but I really don’t feel he is the worst director in the celluloid world either. His movies explore human relationships and provide entertainment to a common layman(which is what I am). They provide a good reality break.I however detest the unnecessary lavishness,gaudiness and melodrama which he dishes out in large proportions.

In ‘Kabhi alvida na kehna’ Karan Johar has meekly submitted to his old failing and seems to have substituted quality with quantity. By ‘quantity’ I not only mean the money splurged on this stupid enterprise but also the unnecessary presence of big stars. I personally feel character actors like Irfan Khan and others could have done a more effective job. But then it would be difficult for Karan to recover the cost of production,wouldn’t it Karan?

The script is so badly written thant the scriptwriter literally needs to be dragged to the streets and whipped in broad daylight.I simply fail to understand why a happily married Maya should have an affair with her old lover …that too when her husband is the’ oh so caring’ type. The characterization of Priety is really regressive….career women are shown to be hard, heartless and ruthless to the core. SRK surprisingly gets the raw deal as his part is very badly written…his mood swings and self pitying nature really irritates the unfortunate viewer.Abhishek Bachcchan also comes across as a highly uncertain character…..his marriage towards the end is one big bloomer! Big B character is a mere caricature and Kajol has practically nothing to do , which is a pity considering what great performers the two of them are.Kiron Kher is in a blink and miss part and her presence is of little consequence.

Thanks to the saddeningly poor characterization , none of the actors really manage to shine in their respective parts. However to give credit where it’s due , I believe Rani managed to rise above the poor script and did quite a good job. She brightens up the dullest of scenes with her scintillating screen presence and amazingly alluring smile.

The story threatens to stretch to eternity due to the lousy screenplay. By the break itself one feels he or she has had an overdose of saccharine sweet melodrama. Speaking of the songs only ‘Mitwa’ stands out. The rest of the songs are not a patch on the songs that SEL have earlier composed for KHNH , Lakshya or DCH. The picturisation of the songs, as in the case of all Karan Johar is brilliant and definitely needs to be lauded.

All said and done , weighing all the plus and minuses , I feel Karan Johar has mucked up big time this time around and needs to go into hibernation and come up with ways of executing good ideas. Sorry Karan but this time you have inflicted a cold , tasteless, bland TURKEY on the audience who have trusted you!!