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Rowling auntyji is at it again
Jan 15, 2004 11:20 AM 2021 Views
(Updated Jan 15, 2004 11:20 AM)

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An extract from a letter from me to my lil cousin sister :


Hi Pooja,


Now you dont start off asking me to call u ''poo'' coz I simply aint


gonna do it. The actual Poo along with her elder sister, has been aptly


named Champa-Chameli by your very own dear premjit uncle. So let me


now tell you about something real special that I know you've been


waiting for a long time.


An explanation for the miles of bandages on my sprained hand.


No I didnt get it from any heroic efforts to save any damsel in


distress. Nothing quite so melodramatic. It was more so from reading


the latest edition of Harry Potter. Lemme tell you one thing bout this


one. Its goddamn heavy. I am planning to ask my gym trainer to


substitute all the dumbells in his gym with rowling aunty's latest


offering on her creation which has caught the fancy of all kiddies like


you all over the world.


Okay baba okay, I admit its not just kiddies, even adults like


me and older than me also had got quite addicted to it. To the extent


that I had also plowed my way through the first two Harry Potter movies


in a bid to satisfy myself and am not ashamed to admit that I spent 2


hours online downloading the trailer for the latest HP movie i.e. The


Prisoner of Azkaban. Guilty absolutely. So I like many others had been


waiting for the chronicles of Harry's 5th year at his magical school


Hogwarts. Helps me get away form the daily grind all that imaginary


world full of hokus pokus and abracadabra stuff. Feels good. That


flying car bit was alo kinda cute in a weird sorta way.


So this 5th book is really heavy. Its got these nearly 900


pages or so, plus the hardbound cover . Whoa its heavy. Better would


have been to get some kinda reading stand or one of those ebooks maybe.


Anyways coming back to the book, the book started off really


interesting. Quite a bit darker than teh last 4 books with all


characters even Harry shedding off his cloak of innocence and emerging


as a not so sweet boy who has temper tantrums, a slightly wicked side


who actually enjoys picking fights with his cousin brother. I mean


harry was really scared of his cuz dudley when harry was weak and


dudley was strong. and Dudley used to take the advantage and bully him.


But now Harry has magic and dudley is scared of that and Harry actually


enjoys kinda pricking and prodding dudley now n then just for kicks.


But I think its good. Rowling auntyji has given some more


human shades to her saccarine sweet innocent lil boy of whose tolerance


level I had been really astonished of. Now harry is more believable.


He even vents his anger on his friends. But the world of Harry aint


dark enough. I mean uptill now lord voldemort had been potrayed so evil


that people had been afraid of even mentioning his name ... what kinda


fear is that. On toppa that it was said that he-who-must-not-be-named


had returned to nearly full power but still Harry is spending an


awesome carefree life with no problems in the horizon. Okay in the


begining two dementors did attack harry. Now these dementors deserve a


paragraph to themselves.


So here goes. In book 3 we had said hi to a very interesting breed


of creatures called dementors who were supposed to be the foulest


creatures that walk this planet. They seem to suck all happiness around


them and their kiss is deadly as they suck out the soul of the person


who gets to pucker up to them. Nice huh ??? Well anyways they werent


scary enough again. I mean Harry our little hero is scared and helpless


against them for only a few chapters before he learns this new magical


trick to repel them. How amazing is that. I mean if there is a horror ,


then play it up more. But no in that book itself dementors problem was


solved and our hero was hapy happy again. Now in the 5th book when dark


powers are supposed to be at their max level, all that that come to


attack harry are again our favourite dementors and our boy wonder


simply waves his wand and life is goody goody again. How amazing is


that ?


Anyways after that harry is shifted to the headquarters of the


''order of the phoenix''. Sounds cool huh. But no explanation as to where


the name came from . And the headquarters right in sirius black's


family home. now sirius black is on the run form the law and he chooses


to hide in his own home. man come on, even our hindi filmwallas know


that if a thief is on the run then he will never hide in his own house


coz thats where the cops keep look first and then surround the place as


a trap. but no such things dont apply to rowling aunty. so black is in


his own house and the headquarters is there too.


Now this order of the phoenix is supposed to very very


impressive. but all they do is conduct hidden meetings and dont let


harry listen to the conversations. So whats the point of putting him in


the same house as the headquarters. Why not somewhere else. Chalo


chhaddo . But all through the book harry's headmaster dumbledore stays


away from him and gives the excuse in the end that he was doing that


coz voldemort can see most of what harry can see bcoz of some


connection formed between them years ago, but still dumbledore installs


harry in the same house as the headquarters. how intelligent is that.


finally all this done and apart harry moves to his school where there


is a new teacher from the ministry with whom harry keeps taking pangas


and gets detention. whats the detention ? writing lines with a pen


which draws blood from his own hand. Ok, lets give some points to


auntyji for some innovativeness.


But aint that a lil too gross for kids like you to read . I mean


girl dont even think of using ur blood to write letters coz then u'll


have a whalloping in store from my side.


Lets come to something else. Cho chang, harry's crush who seems to


be still in deep remorse of her ex-boyfriend getting killed. I mean


come on the kid is just like what 14 or something and already she is


acting like some tragic heroine of our times, or more like yesteryears


queens like meena kumari n stuff. and hermoine granger, the bookworm


suddenly blooms into our very own resident bina ramani meaning agony


aunt, giving harry love advice all the time. Come on guys whatever


happened to good old magic and bad guys and their evil plotting n


stuff.


ps : contd in comments...


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