Down but not Out. Review on Handling Depression

I find it eerie to read young MS writers writing about this subject here on Mouth Shut. I have avoided touching this crazy looney subject though been tempted to many times. Some reviews I read were first person accounts and were spine chillers. Somehow reviews on Depression keep coming back. Are they so many loonies out there on MS? Some say every third person  on earth is a looney!

So am I qualified to broach this subject? Frankly …No….but yes…

I cannot say for sure that I have suffered from depression or schizophrenia. If I have, my defence mechanism was quick to spot it and take corrective actions intuitively.

But I am reasonably qualified to write about this dreaded disease because some of my close colleagues, subordinates and relatives have been victims of DEPRESSION. Besides a class mate of mine is a leading psychiatrist. My father…..in IMHO was the greatest psychologist and reader of human behavior. He sermonized plenty on this subject. He was not a professional though.

I have spoken Publicly on this subject to audiences where I was invited to speak years ago. Now, is this the time to write? I don’t know for sure. Jai’s review triggered off this latent desire.

TYPES OF DEPRESSION: CAUSE AND EFFECT

There be probably 2 or more types of depressions.

IMAGINARY/PHOBIAS: This may come as a surprise. But at least three people I know suffered because they imagined that they were victims of circumstances, people, their wives, and events in their life. They were quite divorced from reality.Their suspicious nature caused them immense grief. A very close relative, otherwise an outstanding professional man, suffers to this day.

REAL EVENTS:  Failure to get promotions, financial stress, failed marriages, joining the wrong profession not suited for them, alcoholism,  loss of self esteem in the eyes of other people and within themselves….were major causes of  Depression. Here I have encountered many folks.

HATE SYNDROME:   Some folks I know hate some people so much, that they end up getting depressed. These folks somehow find other people to be the primary cause of their grief!  These guys are able to deflect their own failures on someone else.

EGO:  Ego per se is a great thing. Ego is what triggers us to write on MS. Ratings, comments on our revues are the part of the ego thing. Which is good and fine. Too much of it is bad. Without an ego man is nothing.

However highly egotistical folks end up getting depressed very early in life.

The flip side of depression is schizophrenia. In layman’s term it means a split personality orMADNESS.  Untreated depression leads to SCHIZO! And treating schizophrenia is a long ask.

Case Study 1

Handsome boy meets beautiful girl in college. They be the ideal couple. They get married. Both do outstandingly well professionally. They earned money enough to wipe out the nation’s deficit and buy a piece of the Taj Mahal! No kidding. Cars, bungalows, flats here, there everywhere, holidays all round the world!

Folks like me and many others worshipped them. They be the perfect example of a great marriage.

12 years on…..dark secrets emerge….marriage goes bust….cute boy hits the bottle, bottle straight to mouth and liver all gone ……..2 kids…….house in flames….love gone outta the window. Reason? Competition! Between husband n wife! Wife’s parents stoke the fires further…..Cute boy ends up in the psy hospital. Wife goes praying to sadhus, munis, temples….too much too late…….no go….end of story.

I say to all. We spend 17 years studying in school and college. To earn bead. Now when we marry…we gotta spend some 50 years together. But we get no formal training/education to warn us what this married life all about. Neither in school or college. Now see our divorce rates. Okay divorce is fine….what about the costs of mental trauma?

Many years ago a junior Naval colleague and me…we analyzed divorces among our Naval community…….Naval society was going through some rapid behavioral changes. We worked out a program to advice young newly married couples and others  how to cope up with STRESS. Our Naval bosses said this is terrific….organized talk shows… I walked away…my colleague took on speaking at seminars….I think he saved many marriages.  A decade later he  did Art of Living and wrote two books. He claims to be in the Inner Circle of Sri Sri. Lunatics. Bless him, he is a Sardar!

Case Study No 2:

Case study no 2 is you and me. Are we normal? Yes and no. If you say “I am normal….” Beware. If you say “Maybe….I am not”….you can learn.

We have two personalities. Self-1 and Self-2.  

Self-1 is the personality we present to the outside world. Self-2 is the natural in born personality that WE ARE!  This is the personality we hide from the outside world. .

Self 2 is the genius, the child like person, a natural learner. Self-2 is the subconscious, genetically super human being.  Self-2 is the person you were destined to be but was destroyed by Self-1.

Who destroyed me? I want an answer. I want it now!

Major culprits:

1. Education:  Formal school education destroys our natural selves. Listen to this song by Pink Floyd 100 times….”We don’t need no education….we don’t need no thought control…..lot’s of hazards in the class room……teachers leave us kids alone. All in all you are just another BRICK IN THE WALL.”  The key word is “Thought control”.

   
   




2. Home: Parental pressure to perform in weird areas destroys our natural selves. I see this happening all the time…. Breaks my heart. Kids become oxymorons, rather than evolving as natural children into great adults. They constantly interfere with the natural learning process of Self-2. Self-1 predominates. No wonder just a few kids survive to succeed later in life.

   
   




3. Environmental influences: Figure this out yourself. The peer pressure, media, competition, look good factor….this is an endless list and the most destructive influence and major cause of depressed minds.

   
   

TRUST YOUR SELF 2 NOW BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE!

In a depressed state of mind, both personalities come in conflict with each other. The key is to suppress Self-1 and allow Self –2 to gain ascendancy slowly.

Self-2 is a natural learner, bereft of complications, has intuitive knowledge, super defence mechanisms and survival skills. Why? Because Self-2 in NOT athinking being.

When someone says “Look within you.”  It means, “Discover your Self-2.”

THINKING……is a good thing. But in a depressed state of mind,  thinking  is a killer.