Aug 25, 2006 09:25 PM
1768 Views
Ok, so there are good movies and there are bad movies. But then there are some movies which go beyond the realm of bad, into a dimension so obnoxious that you have to stuff your fist up your throat to stop yourself from Puking. You'd rather prefer getting slowly skinned, rather than watching the movie. You leave the theatre with look of molested kangaroo, with the sole intention of your life being seeking the producer, directors and actors of the movie, and killing them one by one aftre subjecting them to slow and painful torture. You actually start understanding what drives a normal human to become a terrorist.
- AKS :
The director needs to be paraded naked in public... I WANT MY MONEY BACK.
This guy thinks he is one solid dude...a great film maker. He set out to create a movie, the kind of which was never made and will never be made. He succeeded. It takes real talent to bring together a living legend like Bachchan and the most talented star of the industry - Manoj Bajpai together, and still be able to make a shitpile of a movie, which stinks worse than a month old carca$s of a skunk.
The movie is supposed to signify a very high funda philosophy that every man has an evil side to him. But the director, in his craze to make a 'different' movie, overdid the 'different' part, and made a screwball which eats out your brains.
Don't watch this movie even if you have nothing else to do. Watch the paint on the door dry instead.
- ANSH :
This movie provokes a lot of thoughts. It really makes you think. You think when you are watching the movie, and you continue thinking when the movie is over. You think what kind of a jackass you are to be watching this crap. You think what exactly must have prompted the director to make a movie like this. You think of all the wonderful ways you can torture the director if you ever meet him, and how much you'll enjoy doing it. You think, hell, you can be a director too.
So what happens when a person, extremely underpriviliged when it comes to imagination, gets really inspired after watching some Ramagopal Verma's movies on underworld, looks at his image in the mirror while shaving, and says, "If Verma can do it, you can do it too" (he points to the image in the mirror with his forefinger) ? Well, you get a movie like Ansh.
This movie is a definite watch if you are contemplating suicide and are still not sure. You'll die in the end.
- AISA KYON ? :
After holding the coveted position of the "The most undeserving, ugly, pathetic, untalented, fukfaced son of a b1tch to have touched Bollywood" for years, it's time now for everyone's idol Kishen Kumar to step down and make place for the fresh scum that has dazzled the podium of Bollywood.
The name of the movie : **AISA KYOON?
The name of the wretched phenomenon: RAJESH (no clue about his last name)
Guys, this is the kind of movie that can make Kishen Kumar look like Al Pacino and 'Aaja meri jaan' seem like The Godfather.I wish I had the words to exactly describe what this movie is like and what exactly I felt while watching this movie. This movie is one of those entities, like the beauty of Kashmir, that can't be described but has to be felt. This is probably the only movie whose songs I did not fast forward. I sat through the whole movie, absorbing the sharp pangs of pain, crushing the overpowering urges to smash my head on the window screen, witholding the bile that was rising up my stomach. I came out a much stronger person.
This cho0t-phatang hero, by the name of Rajesh, looks like a Kiraanay ki dukaan-waala. Madarbhagat has swollen cheeks, the hairstyle of a well-groomed pomeranian, a belly, no a$s and matchstick legs. His lips curl in a hearwarming way every time he mouths a dialogue (or doesn't), reminding one of a cute parakeet. He dances like a Kangaroo on a high dosage of Valium and has the charm of a mutilated maggot in a sewage tank. Oh how wonderful it would be to tie this b@stard down, and then slowly push hot iron nails up his nostrils. Then carefully pluckout his fingernails. And then hit him on the face repeatedly with a heavy, blunt object (Nopes, a baseball bat is too soft) till he bleeds to death.
The movie had something to do with reservation policy and the heroine looked like Rambha-DivyaBharti clone, but I was too much engrossed by the charisma of the hero to have noticed that.
Watch this one, folks. If you can sit through this one, you can face anything in life.
- HAWA** : The movie has been made in true Ramsay Brothers style with wails and hisses for no apparent reason. For some fukking reason, the nights are always full of thunder, but no rain.
Family moves to a new house. Udhar bhoot log maar laytay haiN. All in all, same old shyte in a different package. But wait a minnit... there's more.
The USP of this movie is that the ghost is one horny motherfukker. (Now I got your attention, eh? ) The only thing he does in the whole movie is rape Tabu. Alag alag angle se. Missionary, peechhay se, standing position (not kidding), couch pay bitha kay. YUP. This is the first time I have seen something like this in a hindi movie. The ghost is invisible, but Tabu gives a great erformance actually feeling every stroke of the Ghostly Dik. Do shot toh bathroom mein hain boss... nahatay huye
So guys, if you are into jacking off watching supernatural stuff, then this is a must watch. Though I was far from being aroused or feeling any kind of sensual pleasure, , as she is pressed against the bathroom wall, face twisted in a mixed expression of pain and pleasure, rythmically moving with every supernatural stroke being executed from behind.
What the hell is this 7500 word limit ?
