Jun 10, 2005 11:19 PM
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(Updated Jun 10, 2005 11:19 PM)
I had been reading recently about the World XI and Asia XI Cricket teams which gave me an Idea to select the players from the current crop who can make it to the Worlds worst XI.
However all the International players at least most of then are selected purely on Merit so how to select my World’ Worst team was the question?
Answer- REVERSE their current roles
So GENTLE LADIES and LADIES MEN--- I PRESENT TO YOU MY WORLD’S WORST XI CRICKET TEAM.
OPENING BATSMEN--- POSITION 1 AND 2
I select Glenn McGrath and Ashis Nehra – If this pair can bat for a minimum of an hour, it will frustrate the best and the coolest of captains around . Thus when Ricky ponting buries his head in an Ostrich Fashion out of sheer frustration we Can kick his behind the way he thrashed our best Indian team in the past world cup final.
POSITION 3---
This is the most critical batting position which will lead my team from bad to more than worst position.. Ladies and Gentle men I present to you MUUUUUTHIAAH MUUURALITHARAN.
His weird expressions and acts while facing the (.bowler) will make the slowest of opposition bowler to bowl the quickest of delivery and castle his stumps in no time.
POSITION 4—CAPTAIN
The only International Player who has been playing like COCK-A- DOODLE –DO for last 2 years or so an still remains the Captain of not only the Playing 11 on the field but also MILLIONS off the field… LADIES AND GENTLE MEN I present to you SOOOOOOOOURRAV
GAAANNNNGULY---THE CAPTAIN( wah! Wah! Wah! Please clap hands)
To acknowledge his contribution in making a Mediocre team to a fighting team and then back to a mediocre team.. I the selector appoint SOURAV GANGULY as the permanent captain till the day he starts walking on this earth with a walking stick
POSITON 5- WICKET KEEPER BATSMAN-
The player who keeps GLOVES less to Batsmen, and Bats more to Gloves men behind his stumps, LADIES AND GENTLE MEN I PRESENT TO you PAAAAAAAARTHIV PATEL.
I can see a PROUD- C.M- OF GUJARAT... and I have become the HERO OF GUJARAT
POSITION 6- SPECIALIST FIELDERS-
Since more and more one day international cricket is being played, the position of a specialist fielder who cannot do anything else is paramount…
The player(s) whose slow run is like a yawn, and fast run like a walk in the park ladies and gentlemen I Present to you IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNZZZZZZAMAMUL HAQ and VVVVVSSS LAXMAN.
(There will be a toss between them before every match)
POSITION 7&8- SPECIALIST SPINNERS
The bowlers who take a long run—run hard --- a giant delivery stride and then the final leap and effort and bowl with all the energy to the batsmen only to find that the ball has pitched wide and a Gilchrist or a SEHWAG has hammered it to the boundary
LADIES AND GENTLE MEN I present to you SHOOOOAIB AKHTAR and AJJJIT AGARKAR
As specialist spinners.
They can do the same as above now with a short delivery stride and thus save their energy and that of the viewers.
POSITION 9,and 10—PACEMEN
The player who’s behind makes for a fascinating viewing ;;; Ladies and gentle men I present to you DAAAAAAAAANISH KANERIA as my fast bowler no 1 and position 9
The player who throws the ball hard in to the ground whenever hammered hard by the batsmen… Ladies and gentlemen I present to you HAAAAAAAAAARBHAJAN SINGH
As FAST bowler no2 at position no 9,, now he can get even with the hammering batsman by running in hard and throwing it on his face.
POSITION 11--- This place is reserved for the downtrodden and underprivileged players in the cricket world… any one from Bangladesh , Zimbabwe will be selected .
Well folks if only one Indian could be selected to the Worlds best XL team, we should be proud INDIANS now that at least 6 of our current best make it to the world’s worst XL team easily
CHALLENGE--- I throw an open challenge to all cricket buffs on MS, My team is the only team today that can be beaten by Zimbabwe and Bangladesh.
Award- please award for my efforts by commenting, I will give a chance to every one who comments on my selection to play in my team
Regards
