Apr 02, 2010 02:00 PM
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It has been a month, since it happened. An incident which I never imagined would be happening so soon. Death is inevitable, some day or other, we would have to pass away from the world. And that is something we have to face. Death is always painful, but when it occurs to the people closest around you, it is even more painful. And when it strikes with no warning, it is shattering.
As it happened on March 1, 2010, when my Mother passed away, suddenly, leaving us unprepared and shattered to face the reality. The worst thing is that she was quite normal, not really having any major health problems, not ailing and a sudden heart attack, took her away from us. It was like the person whom you were talking to just a moment before, is no longer there. And the reality, that me, Dad and my sister will have to face life without Amma, something that was unimaginable. She had turned 60 last year and we were hoping to receive her valuable guidance, as we coped with our own families, and issues. But as they say, those whom the Gods love they die young. We have to accept the fact, that life from now on would be without Amma. Not an easy ask, considering the influence she has had on our family.
"Life is a stage, and we are just players on it" Amma had to perform multipl rols on stage. She had to juggle her responsibilities between being a mom, a wife, a daughter, a daughter in law and later as a grandmother. And add to it her job as a teacher and considering she was the eldest sister in her family, she had to guide her younger brothers and sister, her cousins. And be the friend you always could turn to. Amma is the major reason for me to believe that women are in no way inferior to men. The way she juggled her work with her household responsibilities, the way she balanced her social life with her own personal life, at the same time stepping in whenever me or my sister made a mistake, was admirable. She was the kind of friend, you always wanted. I had seen many of her friends turning to her, whenever they had some problem or issue in their personal lives. Her philosophy in life was simple, "if someone asks you for help, try your best to help them out". At times i wondered why she should take so much trouble in what was some one else problem, her reply was simple "Be good to others, others will be good to you" .
To me and my sister, she was our friend, philosopher and guide. Some one whom we would turn to for advice for suggestions, for help. She could accept when we made mistakes, but was furious if we tried to cover it up. She could be harsh in anger, but now when we look back, we realize that it was necessary. I am always grateful to Amma for making sure we always walked on the right path, and never strayed from it. She was a loving grandmother, showering love and affection on her 3 grandchildren, who meant the world to her.
"Light a lamp than curse the darkness".
Amma light many a lamp in her own life. Being a teacher, education was one of her major passions in life. She believed that the real merit of a teacher is in motivating average students to be above average and below average students to be average. At 60, she could have led a happy retired life at him, cursing the darkness. But she choose to run a school, located in a low income neighbourhood and played a major role in motivating students, mostly from low income Muslim families to do well academically. Quite so often, she discussed with me how parents nowadays neglect children and their studies, something anathema to her.
