Worst of the Year. Review on Bunty Aur Babli

Movie Title: “BUNTY AUR BABLI”

RATING: * (OUT OF )

Review by Ranju Anthony

India, 2005

Running Length: 170 Mins

Censor Board Certification: U

Language: Hindi

Genre: Adventure

(Wide Release)

Director: Shaad Ali

Producer: Nitin Manmohan and Sohail Maklai / Yashraj Films

Screenplay: Aditya Chopra & Jaideep Sahni

Cinematography:

Cast: Amitabh Bachchan, Abhishek Bachchan, Rani Mukherjee, Raj Babbar & Aishwarya Rai

Music: Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy

Praise the Lord! The words that came out of my mouth after enduring the 150 minutes ordeal that goes by the name of ‘Bunty aur Babli’. One of the worst con movies ever made in any country and in any language; allow me to create part of a monologue that must have transpired behind the production team of this celluloid revulsion.

The Screenplay Writer: Hey Guys! I’ve got a brilliant idea! Why not make an Indianised version of ‘Natural Born Killers’. After all! Only ‘different’ movies seem to work these days.

Biggie Producer: Huh! Where are the takers? You see, we only work with the biggies and biggies never work in such projects. But let’s give it a shot; so why not have a brainstorming session with our stars and leave it on them. In the meanwhile, you could convert ‘Natural Born Killers’ into Hindi minus the expletives and gore.

The Screenplay Writer: But what are we left with case we take off gore & profanity. All right then Why not make ‘Oceans Eleven’ and instead of taking eleven actors; we could zero in our couple of biggie pairs.

Biggie Producer: Hmm!

Again films like ‘Ocean Eleven’ don’t work. And who’s gonna use brains while watching a Hindi movie in this country. Just spare the audience; what they require is clean and easy (read escapist) entertainment. More importantly, how do we insert songs in such ventures? We’ll end up annoying the reviewers as well as the mainstream audience.

The Screenplay Writer: Do you watch MTV? There’s a show called ‘Bakra’ hosted by some Virus Bacchda. It’s very popular among the youth; I may just identify some stuff for our screenplay out of it and we could also use their channel for our propaganda. Yup! That’s it! A comedy always works in this country; regardless how ridiculous it may look like.

Biggie Producer: Sounds kind of cerebral to me. Just ensure that there’s enough slapstick in it.

The Screenplay Writer: So which of the Khan’s do you think would fit the bill?

Biggie Producer: We won’t go for a Khan this time. Let’s bet on this upcoming lad. Most of his films seem to work these days besides these Khans are no longer a safe proposition. Yes! We’ll take this father-son duo and put one front line beauties in an item number.

The Screenplay Writer (in a protesting tone): But front line actresses won’t do item numbers.

Biggie Producer: Mellow down Bacche! Humne bade badon ko nachaaya hai. Ab bhee nachaa hi lenge. For the heroine……er…

The Screenplay Writer: Sorry to interrupt you sir! Allow me to identify one, since we require a very down to earth; girl next door kinda look. How about ?

Biggie Producer: Are you nuts! We only work with good looking ladies. I remember once working with her and we had to spend close to Rupees 1 crore to make her look a bit presentable.

The Screenplay Writer: I remember that sir! But didn’t we recover money in that venture as well. Besides, we want somebody who could make audience laugh, you know, and I don’t recall any other name who would agree to play this imperceptive character with aplomb.

Biggie Producer (hurriedly): Well then! let the dice rolling.

Even choppily-edited, badly-dubbed martial arts movies imported from Hong Kong may leave a smile on your face but occasionally comes a movie which tests your intelligence quotient (and patience) to this barbaric level.

Is there a plot? The protagonists; Rakesh(Abhishek) and Vimmi(Rani) are perennial dreamers born in their respective inconsequential small towns. One fine day, they decide to elope from their individual cages (as interpreted by the director) for whatever reasons. Vimmi (now re-christened as Babli) wants to become a Miss India and Rakesh wants to be the top henchman in the field of finance. Dreams are soured as they face worldly realities and a chanced meeting between the two culminates in a sort of partnership with the scope of ruling the world through forgery and con. The bigger B emerges as a cop (DCP Dashrath Singh) somewhere near the intermission to intercept the nagging twosome.

Abhishek Bachchan seems to sleepwalk through this role amid his new found success through ‘DUS’ and ‘Sarkar’ leaves a sort of blasé and jaded look in his performance. Rani Mukherjee has done whatever she is required to do. Sure, it surprises me that a wretched performer like her is constantly compared with the likes of Kajol and Juhi Chawla (whom I vote as the best performer where comic sequences are demanding) . Maybe, it has something to do with her histrionics in front of media that garners her so much of eminence. Amitabh Bachchan is the lone crusader who tries hard to inflict some watch able moments in this otherwise unwatchable trash.

In one of the early scenes, Abhishek Bachchan impersonates as a ticket checker and gets away with his hoodwink with such ease that the viewer is left gasping. In such a short span, he effortlessly manages to get a uniform, the list of passengers and even manages to get an unattended berth. Way back, a similar scene was enacted in a potboiler directed by David Dhawan and the effect was delectably enjoyable thanks to some good dialogues and comic timing. Yes the word’s ‘Comic Timing’ and it’s definitely not around in this project.

Yes, it exasperates me greatly that the director can take such liberties in the name of entertainment because, the moviegoer shells out an enormous amount to purchase a movie ticket and if this is what we gets in the name of entertainment; NOT EVEN SPEILBERG CAN SALVAGE BOLLYWOOD.

Arguably, the most ‘intellectual’ aspect of this movie is its use of an item number using the beautiful Aishwarya Rai. Unfortunately, the script and directing abilities are so shoddy and restricted that the entire framework becomes one gargantuan in-joke.

Well, if you have gone to attend this screening for the plot, you have made a mistake. Come to think of it, if you have gone for the comedy, you’ve again made a mistake. In fact, if you’ve gone at all, you’ve made a TERRIBLE mistake.