May 24, 2007 11:47 AM
8561 Views
(Updated May 24, 2007 12:14 PM)
Ever guessed what is the most effective way of making yourself unpopular at any gathering – the best bet is defend the Indian cricket team. Yes, you did hear it right, ”defend” them. A small clarification here though – when I say the team, there is an honorable exclusion – a certain Sachin Tendulkar.
My early recollections of cricket enquires have always been two questions and in that particular sequence –
1) “Sachin Ne Kitne Mare?”
2) “India ka Kya Score Hai?*”
My problem is not with the questions but the sequence in which they are put, always dear Sachin is more important than the team itself. And while on the subject, have your ever hear someone say “How’s Munaf bowling?”Unlikely they are more likely to ask “How’s Patel bowling?”, then why Sachin and not Tendulkar. Take a small pop quiz, how many of you even know Sreesanth’s first name? Guess you would have got my point and those who do know his first name, GET A LIFE!
These days the Indian team is getting bashed from right, left and center. The list of people criticizing them includes:
1) My friend with an IQ level of seven and looks to match, who himself once bowled a record 15 of the wide ones in an over and struck with his sixteenth bowl which he claims was straight and fast(Eye witness say the cause was that the batsman has fallen asleep).
2) My seventeen-year old cousin who feels they should be thrown off the plane(and he kids not!). He himself averages 3.2 runs per innings in his HOWRAH Rail Colony Block C League that largely comprises of nine year old kids.
3) My seventy-year old uncle who claims that he could smash the living daylights of the Indian attack. Of course, the fact that he has arthritis and in all likelihood has never held a bat in his hand does take a bit of sheen of his claim.
4) My seven hundred kilo neighbor, who feels that they should invest the money in some other sport. Dear madam, we all know your enthusiasm but Sumo wrestling is not yet an Olympic sport.
Most of the comparisons done are with the Australian team. Now compare an average 30-year old Aussie with an Indian guy. I think the only similarity will end at the slight beer belly. Once Andrew Symonds and Matt Hayden went deep-sea fishing and their boat capsized in the middle, and they swam back the entire 5 km., can you imagine Ajit and Shanthakumaran(yeah I know I need to get a life!) doing it? I have personally bowled to a guy who was about Hayden’s build and trust me, when he advances towards you with that big bat, kaafi p___ leti hai.
The funniest thing is the bigger the critic; the worse they are at the game. And people, who say that money should be invested in other sports, try these numbers:
159-The ranking of the Indian soccer team
269 – The highest-ranking Indian male tennis player
11 - Indian hockey team’s ranking at the last world cup – yeah don’t get too happy it was out of 12 teams.
3026 – The predicted year when we will a medal in the Olympics track event( and that is being optimistic).
Not so pleasing, are they? Makes our cricket team look much better don’t they? So the next time, you criticize Virendra and Yuvraj, think about it!
