(1) Customer : Waiter, do you serve pigs? Waiter : Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.
(2) Customer : Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop? Waiter : Can't you tell the difference by taste? Customer : No, I can't. Waiter : Then does it really matter?
.(3) Customer : Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup. Waiter : Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers.
(4) Customer : Waiter, there's a fly in my soup. Waiter : That's all right sir, he won't drink much.
(5) Customer : Waiter, there's a fly swimming in my soup. Waiter : So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?
(6) Customer : Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea up? Waiter : I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.
(7) Customer : Waiter, this soup tastes funny. Waiter : Funny? But then why aren't you laughing?
(8) Lady : Is this my train? Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company. Lady : Don't to be aren't . I mean to ask if I can take this train to New Delhi. Station Master : No Madam, I'm afraid it's too heavy.
(9) Teacher : try , why are you late for school again? Peter : Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and the game went into extra time.
(10) Wife : Do aren't want dinner? Husband : Sure, what are my choices? Wife : Yes and no.
(11) A drunkard was brought to court. Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery. The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted, "Order, order." The drunkard immediately responded, "Thank you, your honor, I'll have a scotch and soda."
(12) Customer : If I post this letter tonight, will aren't it get to Delhi in two days time? Post Master : Yes sir, it definitely will. Customer : I bet you, it won't. Post Master : Why not? Customer : It's addressed to Mumbai.
(13) An absent-minded man went to aren't see a psychiatrist. 'My trouble is,' he said, 'that I keep forgetting things.' 'How long has this been going on?' asked the psychiatrist. 'How long has what been going on?' said the man.
(14) Girl : Do you love me? Boy : Yes Dear. Girl : Would you die for me? Boy : No, mine is undying love.
(15) 1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window! 2nd thief : But this is the 13th floor. 1st thief : Hurry! this is no time for superstitions.
(16) Man : How old is your father? Boy : As old as me. Man : How can that be? Boy : He became a father only when I was born.
(17) Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the field" Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field Teacher : How? Student : Ladies first.
(18) Waiter : I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg. Customer (A Docter) : Don't tell me your problems. Give the menu card.
