Wind kisses his face gently, as he leans over the railing holding the glass of JD… the puff inhaled from the fifth cigarette finally reaches the heart, He feels the warmth inside. He never reckoned cigarette can warm his heart. As he kissed the butt of the ciggy and tried squeezing all possible content left – he smiled over the thought of those endless kisses when the butt wasn't the only option.
The lane looked fuzzier than usual; it reminded him of "Janmashtmi Festival". The tiny lanes, toy cars, tiny people … the whole world seemed smaller than usual to him today from that '13th floor' his favorite hang-out of those lonely nights.
The streetlights of the church street, the flash from the hoardings at brigade seems to be mocking at him. They remind him of those endless nightlife, giggles on the quite road and the speedometer touching '120'. His thoughts get interrupted by a meek voice "Last order sir, bar is about to close"…he gives him a stupid grin and asks him to repeat the same order 7th time.
He fiddles with his cell phone, his ally of the Good/Bad/Ugly times of life. He reaches the folder of some saved old messages (Even cellphone has an option of Past, How Ironical). He could hear a familiar LOUD voice within "you are not suppose to read them" – Aah voices of those bunch of good lads who come with a board "I will help you get over".Somehow with 7 pegs down his throat he does not want hears to those voices. His emotions ride better than his sensibility – His heart succeeds over his mind… and He mutters within "Damn the getting over funda".
He finally opens the folder and began reading all possible pleasant/unpleasant memories in form of text messages. Since he is seven pegs down he will remember only the good memories, "Those mawkish “will-never-leave-you" messages. Now He scrolls down the phonebook and stops at 'D' --- "DO NOT CALL", No that's not a name it's a warning message a reminder to what he has (or others made him) vouch for. He wonders if he can just press the button to hear a conversant voice on the other side and can pour his heart out and later can blame on alcohol.
But Alcohol can sometimes be a little too messy and can make you do things you have restrained yourself from and list of such things begin with calling your "Beloved". He tries calling the "do not call number" and before it can even ring, disconnects the call.. In the huss huss of moment He looses balance and glass slips from his hand to kiss the last goodbye on the ground. Someone holds Him back to remind he is not as priceless as the glass to fall and break …. But then again "Damn the be strong lessons"….
Song in the background puts him in a doubt if the restaurant guys are mocking at his loneliness but he starts humming the same:
All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go.
I'm standing here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say Goodbye
So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go
Don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe I hate to go
There's so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I tell you now they don't mean a thing
Well now the time has come to leave you
One more time please let me kiss you
Then close your eyes and I'll be on my way
Dream about the days to come
When I won't have to leave you alone
About the times I won't have to say Goodbye
Good Bye' hah .. He wished if Goodbye can end something.. Alcohol can help you do whatever you desire to do in true sense. Which you know you wanna do but sometimes your own EGO or your so called SAVIOURS, sometime your empty PROMISES to yourself don't let you do it.
He leaves the railing and leans more than required to do what he wanted to do right away ….He could see his body floating … just waiting for the last hit "Thud".
A Deafening thud which would reverberate for eons....with a question hanging in air. Was it worth the trouble?
P.S: Inspired by Neon Lights & Walk Away !!
