1.) Some guy bought a newfridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yardand hung a sign on it saying: 'Free to good home. You want it, you take it.'For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice atit. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal.
It looked too good tobe true, so he changed the sign to read: 'Fridge for sale $50.'
Thenext day someone stole it!
2.)One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someoneshouted....'Look at that dead bird!' Someone looked up at the sky andsaid...'where?'
3.)While looking at a house, my brother asked the estate agent which direction wasnorth because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up everymorning. She asked, 'Does the sun rise in the north?' When my brother explainedthat the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head andsaid, 'Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff'
4.)My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheardone of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on herweekend drive to the beach. She drove down in a convertible, but 'didn't thinkshe'd get sunburned because the car was moving'.
5.)My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it's designed to cut through a seatbelt if she gets trapped She keeps it in the trunk.
6.)I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attachedto an earring by a chain. My friend said, 'Wouldn't the chain rip out everytime she turned her head?' I had to explain that a person's nose and ear remainthe same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned...
7.)I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lostluggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. Shesmiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and Iwas in good hands. 'Now,' she asked me, 'Has your plane arrived yet?'...
8.)While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go.He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. 'Just cut itinto 4 pieces; I don’t think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.
