Road rules in hyderabad
Dos and don'ts on hyderabad roads. If only it was simple enough for me to explain.
First basic requirements.
1.Show absolutely NO respect for Traffic police or Signals or rules.
2.Unless you want the easiest way to commit suicide, you should be very sober.. I mean so sober you should be able to tell Cristiano Ronaldo's present girl friend
3.Do not start well ahead of your schedule to reach your destination...its your wish though...well you ll be the one missing all the action...
4.High volume head-sets....MUST. You don't want to hear anything around right from Profanity to horns
5.Never ever drive in a good mood. You are gonna end up in a foul mood anyway.
What you may also have.. but need not necessarily have to..
1.Driving license/Vehicle papers
2.Any minor knowledge of driving or on-road courtesy
3.Experience of playing Rugby
4.The idea of how valuable human life is. sentimental ain't it? :'(
5.A bike or car. (Come on you dont need them to create chaos in traffic)
Warnings
1.Never brake even at top speed. keep changing lanes and irritating people ..but NEVER reduce speed
2.Never show even the most mildest respect for fellow drivers or pedaestrians. (As you notice yr exp in rugby ll come in handy)
3.Never take the correct side when the wrong side route is shorter
4.Never allow people to cross the road keep them guessing till the last second
5.ALWAYS overtake from the left
All the above may include but is never restricted to .....
1.Save fuel.Never miss an opportunity to drive triples.
2.Always Use a low median to get to other side. No fuss please.
3.If its a fork junction, NEVER expect to cross it easily.
4.Never miss a chance to be a douche bag and fume-up people by honking your horns before signal turns green.
5.Never drive near an Auto without confirming that your insurance renewal.
Common misconcemptions that should be avoided
1.There will be some SANE drivers in this place.
2.Lady drivers are harmless..meaning they follow rules a little
3.Trafic will stop if signal falls.
4.You can overtake a public bus and live through it
5.Once met with an accident, a small plastic object called helmet will save you.
Quotes on Hyderabad's traffic
1.Speed is cool. Breaking a speed rule is even cooler
2.Its your road. You are welcome to take your risk
3.Accidents Happen. Please park 100 metres away from scene.
4.Drive ANYWHERE on earth. You HAVE after all driven at Hyderabad.
5.Best roads. Worst drivers. Guaranteed.
