An email was recently forwarded to me whose subject was “avoiding indecency”. It was an appeal from the Vellore Institute of Technology, Vellore campus' management to VIT students to avoid physical contact except for handshakes, which if not obeyed would be met with “suitable corrective actions.” I also received excerpts of comments posted on some blogs and Internet sites. I had missed and so had not written about last year’s suspension of two female students and an American scientist/faculty member by VIT University when they conducted online surveys regarding the discriminatory hostel policies towards women. I had some things I had wanted to write about and with this recent email, I decided to finally sit down and write.
I am usually supportive of reasonable actions taken by administrators and managements to regulate employee and student behaviour. No matter what people say, regardless of all the things we have taken from the West, we haven’t taken everything that could be useful. We cannot protect our children as much as an average middle-class European or American can, we have no easy recourse to effective and prompt legal action if necessary, we do not have the same attitude towards work and career as the Americans and Europeans do, and gender-related differences still affect even simple life choices in Indian society.
Recalling some of the comments in reaction to this circular, I would say that even today, many Indian youngsters allow their parents to shape their careers and overall life choices. Even today, girls will not study further because this may affect their ability to find a suitable life partner, and if they do, how easy their career paths may be will depend not just on their own skills but also largely on how supportive their in-laws and husbands are. Juggling work and personal life is a good catch-phrase, it’s not that easy anywhere in the world, but it's even harder in India.
An American couple may break up and if there are no children, multiple partners or mental/physical handicaps involved, both the male and female partners can go on to find other partners. However, in India, even today, men are less affected by break-ups and romantic entanglements than women. Things have changed, and still not. Youngsters may yearn to break free of parental supervision and enjoy their youth but their inability to think of consequences in such a society can not be easily ignored by their parents. Of course, the fact that these youngsters need to learn to manage their own daily needs and other emotional and mental ups and downs is something that parents and other grownups need to learn and accept.
So is it wrong that they should be asked not to indulge in public displays of affection? I say not at all. In fact, etiquette, learning how to behave oneself and being good citizens are all important things everybody needs to learn(even adults). But being overly strict and talking about archaic values in today’s world will also not work. Something that is missing in Indian society and therefore, the work place, is the ability of men and women to accept each other’s presence and compete on the basis of competence instead of gender. Not completely possible but still a worthy dream. Would a handshake not be sufficient to foster such co-existence? Why not? Is it necessary to embrace and go to other lengths to feel comfortable with the opposite sex? A lot of such behaviour is also connected to the need to show off to one’s peers.
Now going to the hostel issues. I am in favour of reasonable in-times for women AND MEN. There is no reason why male students should roam around till 10 PM on weekdays and 11:30 PM on weekends. If we want to protect women from social evils and ensure that they are herded indoors by 8 PM, we should also make sure that men be kept away from the same social evils and not be left to roam around. They too are susceptible to criminal assault and other problems. So I would actually suggest in-times of 9 PM for both men and women on weekdays and 10:30 PM on weekends. Finish your studies during the week and be inside by 10:30 PM if you go out to catch a movie or return from a shopping trip on the weekend. Exceptions if people have to travel longer distances for family visits or are carrying out project work in labs.
Even this would seem draconian to some parents and many youngsters. But that’s my opinion and I expressed it. However, three things came to my mind: one, Valentine’s day, two, actual employment and other policies, three, international readiness.
Valentine’s day: this circular was sent twelve days after Valentine’s day, a day for which on- and off-campus shops in and near VIT prepare by stocking up on chocolates, roses, cards and random gift items. Why support commerce connected to fraternising between the sexes when you cannot stomach the manifestations? Why is VIT management behaving like the USA—make money off of selling ammunition but talk about the need to refrain from using all this and threatening sanctions if disobeyed?
Why talk about dress codes and avoiding sleeveless clothes when you have a fashion show(Style Check) in your student-driven festival, Riviera where the contestants show off a lot of skin? Why should students be staging fashion shows?
Actual employment policies: Regardless of the fact that women’s hostels are named after famous women, how friendly is VIT towards women students and employees? Do they have the same access to opportunities and recognition as the males? Or is VIT(like many teaching jobs in India) an easy way to get some monetary compensation for a flexible work schedule while women manage their families and still get out of their homes a little? Do the female students have the same access to jobs and other internships as the males? Do female faculty and staff get paid the same as the men and are they given enough importance in the workplace? Of course, is this happening anywhere in India that it will happen in VIT? We are one week away from Women’s day and there will be the same stories featuring the same few powerful women connected to powerful men who have broken glass ceilings in their fields. But the glass ceiling and the iron gate remain realities below and behind which females remain locked even today.
International readiness: I am not sure why that American professor, Ted Moallem, decided to stick his neck out to start an online petition to support the two girls but Americans are big on civil rights. While VIT and others talk of international communities and foreign collaborations, they seem to have a major problem with people speaking their minds. How will they take their seat in the international arena if they could not even manage that situation without firing the guy? How will the management manage the student population if they only see them as sources of fees and children who should be seen and not heard?
