Actually the list is really vast! I just put that up there in the heading because it sounded nice. Being a mom is tough when you wanna be the kid yourself and actually join your kid in all the mischief she indulges in. Here are some things I want to desperately do but can’t because my daughter’s watching me:
Scream out the choicest of expletives at the annoying guy behind my car – who keeps honking while we’re stuck in a traffic jam. I mean what does he expect me to do – fly the car?? (Next time she’ll use that vocabulary in school and her teacher will pull my ears for sure!)
Grow my nails long and paint them with fancy nail polishes. (Then she will look at me with a puppy dog expression and ask me – “but you cut MY nails?”. It’s a tough job then to explain to her that she is in school and they are not allowed to keep long nails in school and that I’ve passed all these crazy stages in life and am supposed to be at a point where I can do what I want!) So, well…I simply cut my nails with her every Sunday.
Eat lots and lots of ice-lollies – different flavours - and after each one stick my tongue out in front of the mirror and see if my tongue has become colourful.
Keep chewing bubble gums all day and blow disgustingly huge bubbles with it.
Eat choco-bars, lick the wrapper and then when it melts and dribbles down my arm – lick it all the way…
When I’m eating something really delicious like yummy hot aloo paratha and it accidentally falls on the floor – pick it right off the floor and eat it.
When it starts raining simply walk of the house and walk in the rain
Do a broom dance in front of the dressing mirror when I’m sweeping my room.
Sing really loudly (and badly) in the bathroom when I’m having a bath. (she hates my singing)
Jump up with joy and scream “hey aeroplane” when I see it go up in the sky.
Throw kids off the swing at the park and sit on it myself.
Make Dracula teeth with popcorns and mock scare the person next to me when I’m watching a boring movie in a cinema hall.
Mess up the rangoli in front of somebody’s house when I’m in a bad mood
Get really really really really drunk without feeling guilty about it later
Sleep till 11 in the morning…
Wipe my wet hands on my dress
Run and climb up a mound of sand that’s gathered at any construction site and slide down the sand
Jump and splat water at everyone around me when I’m at the beach.
Like I said, the list is endless and I could just go on and on. So many things I cannot do because I have to set the right example and act all grown up and dignified. But let me confess – that I do succumb to the child in me and do some not-so-mom things all the time…but still…how nice if I could be a kid again.
