FEAR ~ your choice- Fight back or surrender !!!. Review on Dealing with Fear

Fear ~  it’s one word which brings in negative feelings. Fear means an anxious feeling. You may be fearful in any situation, eg just before an interview, result of the exam, when your ex.  Calls after a long time, or when the boss calls in the office when he’s in anger that has risen to mount Everest, when

somebody else scolds, or even  while getting married(well this last one was joke, a SERIOUS joke)

Fear may have unlimited reasons, needless to say, so are

it’s unlimited symptoms.

First of all let’s catch that RED light signal to

understand, when exactly we’re in fear.

*RED   LIGHT   symptoms

*1. Shaky or shivering legs, hands, body

1. Sweating neck, back, forehead, head etc.

2. Butterflies in stomach

3. Weakening body, falling in sleep at an unexpected time

4. Loosing the sense of cautiousness or responsive action sense

5. Freezing of palms, legs

6. Pounding heartbeats

7. The body hair stands erect

8. Changes in body, pale face, throat- desert dry etc.

9. Lastly extreme enervation, exhaustion

Well, these’re few symptoms to recognize the feeling of

fear. We may feel fearful of many things.*

Dreadfuls

*1. Insects and animals like snake, cockroach, lizard, dog, cat

etc

1. Ghosts n supernatural power

2. A particular person like ex., boss, husband, wife,

teacher

1. A particular situation like exams, interviews, public

speaking, darkness etc.

1. Members of opposite sex

2. Crowded places – bus terminal, railway station

3. Rain, thunders, storm, even  a weather~sunny burning summers without

water n electricity

1. Monday blues- when we’ve the entire hectic week ahead

2. Morning blues- it often  results in sickness like morning cold,

unlimited sneezes

1. Just after doing something wrong/ immoral/ things

prohibited etc*

>>>>> Why do we fear?*

Fear is common in all age groups. We feel fearful because of

*some experience** having  a very

solid reason behind it. Sometimes you may know the reason of your fear and

sometimes you’re in a mess that “why the hell on earth do I fell fearful?”

let’s go to the **deep roots of fear**. I

*Case- 1***

Remember, your mom often used to threat you for locking

you in bathroom which is dark, full of cockroaches and lizards and even have

ghost in it , if you refuse to obey her

? **well this is the root that gave birth to many fears namely – darkness,

ghost, insects and even “mom “ in extreme situation. The poor child, if he

refuses, gets locked in the bathroom. Let’s not talk about the time duration of

his lock up, let’s see what happens during that time. At this crucial time he

cries, bangs the door, makes noise etc…. but at the same time it’s imbibed in

him that all these things are dreadful viz. darkness, ghost, insects and mom

off course! he carries these fears in his conscious mind  till his teenage and after that it stays in

his subconscious till he’s alive

*Case-2*

*Fear of crowded place** I personally had this fear.  Fear of crowed

places like a railways station or a bus terminal( not talking about normal bus

stops). I’ve worked out why I fear them and I’ll share it with you. Way back

when I must have been a child of 2-3 years, my parents used to instruct me not

to go anywhere, or else a strange looking man probably in black dress will take

me to his place, eat me or sell me to somebody. They used to make me hold their

hands tight, not to take out my hand out of train or else it’ll get chucked off

completely and then after I wont be able to write and forget if somebody will

marry me and I’ll be an unemployed spinster with a broken hand and a heart!

Well this was the height! the environment as known by all

is fearful(especially for kids)  people

are busy, running in hurry, trains make unbearable noise. Those coolies –

dressed in red, carrying 25kg on their head, parents instructing their kids

(obviously for child’s good)…. al this is scary. The fears that I got from

this experience -crowded place, coolies, strange looking man eager to snatch

and sell the child, trains running at an unimaginable speed and chucking off

hand!*

Case -3***

Scared of opposite sex?  **kids who did their schooling from a

boarding school or a non co-ed school might have problem in getting comfortable

with members of opposite sex. This lack of comfortable level catches fire, if

the first few experiences aren’t good. It goes same for boys and girls. **“For

HIM”-** I know a friend of mine who even finds problem having an eye contact

and talking with girls. Thanks to his boarding schools where he has developed

gynaephobia. After passing  boarding

school he didn’t have a good experience with two of our female teachers. That

added a fuel to fire. This little fire caught flames when his girl friend left

him and insulted him publically. So we’ve a ready made man who can’t feel

comfortable with females**.”FOR HER”-**  Before marriage a girl lives with her parents.

If the experience isn’t good with father/ brother/ some maternal or paternal

uncle(mama, chacha etc.);  and after

marriage if the exp. Is bad with her husband, we’ve a girl who fears/

hates/distrusts men community as a whole i.e. androphobia.

These’re just 3 cases and we’ve numerous other cases as

well. **Crux is that, fear comes from some bad  experience**. But in some cases we feel

afraid of something that we’ve never experienced before like while public

speaking, marriage(for bachelors), visiting a place for the first time. Well

this also comes from some sort of experience, i.e. bad experience from unknown

or unexpected. Surprises aren’t always pleasant.

*>>>>>>> Can we do away with them?*

Certainly yes! we can get rid off any fear on Earth! After

all fear is germinates and ends in mind. Suggestions that can help you are;-

*1.Acknowledge**- accept that you’ve a fear. I know at a

mature age it isn’t easy to accept that you’re afraid of something. This hurts

and punchers ego. But first be polite with yourself. Accept it gracefully. Talk

to a trusted friend. Taking counseling from an expert is also advisable.  And then proceed on to ride to be a fearless

person.

*2. Work out the root cause –**once you know the reason

of your fear, it’s 70% battle won! go back to your past, think about the first

few experience.

*3. FACE it or SURRENDER in front of it – well this is the

crux, the climax of my review**. Once you accept yourself in that fear, and

know the reason why you’re afraid, you can hit the root cause of your fear. You

can hit your fear by telling yourself consciously and subconsciously that you

no more feel afraid of it. Read “Power of your Sub-conscious mind “ by Dr.

Joseph Murphy. Read and browse through the tips to do away with

fear. I assure  you’re sure that you’ll

get ideas popping from every where  very

soon. You’ll get the

ideas to do away once to chose to fight the fear.

*Running is no option**, your fear will come back in any

form sooner or later, if you chose to surrender or chose to run away from it. **FIGHT

FROM FEAR**! there’s a treasure in winning over your fears!

*Don’t surrender! Face it and then Fight back!*