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Bring Out the Real Person in You
Apr 09, 2002 04:27 PM 3002 Views
(Updated Apr 09, 2002 04:27 PM)

Achieving life is not the equivalent of avoiding death.


-Ayn Ra*d. Author


Winds of change…


Winds of change, always affects everyone’s life at some stage or the other. Things have really changed at least for me in the last 3 to 4 years. I have been never been a person who would really come forward and speak very openly but my job has really made me outgoing. Though, from being a hard core software professional to an absolutely commercial and communication head is definitely was never imagined by me.


Books…they wrote…


Though, I don’t believe in reading lot of books by Godman’s and modern philosophers because they usually don’t practice what they preach. Hence, I usually make my own thoughts which, I practice in my daily life. Though it doesn’t mean I don’t implement other people’s thoughts. Just a weeks back, I was taken forcibly to Iskcon(First time), on my b’day and I was gifted a book by one of my seniors “Path to Self-realization”. Which was nothing but a crisper way of presenting the thoughts of the Bagavat Gita, though the book focused heavily on giving Krsna consciousness to the people. Some of the thoughts in the books are really practical, but all these religious books focus on one thing, i.e., this is the only religion which does this, doest that.Etc. Hence, I basically avoid reading this book.


Though, your experience is the mother of all lessons, its really true, because every day, every moment is a lesson which you learn. I am sure many of you, during various stages of your life must have come across many instances were you felt, that this person, or this incidence has put a great mark and life has never been the same.


Without wasting much of your time, let me give you in very short some simple, rules I follow in my life.


“Think first of the other fellow…”


This is THE foundation - the first requisite - for getting along with others.  And it is the one truly difficult accomplishment you must make.  Gaining this, the rest will be “a breeze.”


” Respect other person’s right to be different…”


One thing, it’s very important to understand that No two person are same. Every individual is different and his behavior should not by any way make you feel bad or reflect a change in your behavior.


” Appreciate others thoughts…”


If we think someone has done a thing well, we should never hesitate to let him know it.  WARNING: This does not mean promiscuous use of obvious flattery.  Flattery with most intelligent people gets exactly the reaction it deserves - contempt for the egotistical “phony” who stoops to it.


Remove Negative thoughts…


Criticism seldom does what its user intends, for it invariably causes resentment.  The tiniest of disapproval can sometimes cause a resentment which will rankle - to your disadvantage - for years.


” Make other person feel important…”


When we make the other person seem less important, we frustrate one of his deepest urges.  Allow him to feel equality or superiority, and we can easily get along with him.


” Try to understand the other person…”


Just get into his shoes, and understand what is going on his mind. When you see, the “whys of him you can’t help but get along with him


” First impression is the last impression…”


We are especially prone to dislike some people on first sight because of some vague resemblance(of which we are usually unaware) to someone else whom we have had reason to dislike.  Follow Abraham Lincoln’s famous self-instruction: “I do not like that man, therefore I shall get to know him better.”


“Even small details lost, is a big loss…”


Watch your smile, your tone of voice, how you use your eyes, the way you greet people, the use of nicknames and remembering faces, names and dates.  Little things do add polish to your skill in dealing with people.  Constantly, deliberately think of them until they become a natural part of your personality.


” Never try to reform people in front of a crowd…”


Every man knows he is imperfect, but he doesn’t want someone else trying to correct his faults.  If you want to improve a person, help him to embrace a higher working goal - a standard, an ideal - and he will do his own “making over” far more effectively than you can do it for him


” Develop…interest in people…”


You cannot successfully apply the foregoing suggestions unless you have a sincere desire to like, respect and be helpful to others.  Conversely, you cannot build genuine interest in people until you have experienced the pleasure of working with them in an atmosphere characterized by mutual liking and respect.


Finally…** “When You Earnestly Believe


You can compensate for a lack


of Skill by Doubling Your Efforts!


There is no end in what


You can’t do. “ *


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