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n delhi India
Jan 10, 2012 12:40 AM 5031 Views
(Updated Jan 10, 2012 12:41 AM)





Players, is an Abbas Mustang heist movie starring the usual culprits Bollywood has to offer; the first son - Abhishek Bachchan, the first girlfriend - Bipasha Basu, the first daughter - Sonam Kapoor, the first younger brother - Bobby Deol, the first nobody- Neil Nitin Mukesh, the first oshoite- Vinod Khanna, the last stand-up comedian- Johnny Lever, the fourth idiot - Omi Vaidya and the first underdog- Sikander.

Ravi Yadav's cinematography is competent and the film ably captures the virginised locales of Russia and New Zealand. Allan Amin's action is well-designed. Pritam's music is plain. The movie is a dud. The movie is a remake of the Italian Job which is a 2003 heist film directed by F. Gary Gray. The film stars Mark Wahlberg, Charlize Theron, and Donald Sutherland. It is an American remake of a 1969 British film of the same name, and is about a team of thieves who plan to steal gold bullion from a former associate who double crossed them.

Most of the earlier films were shot on location in Venice and Los Angeles, where canals and streets, respectively, were temporarily shut down. In New Zealand they shut down the Indian crew for spitting and pissing on the streets. A sequel, The Brazilian Job, has reportedly been in development since 2004, but has yet to be produced as of 2012 due to lack of interest after the Indian tribute.

The use of BMW's then-new line of retro-styled Minis in the film was mentioned by critics and business analysts alike as a prime example of modern product placement, or more specifically "brand integration". Some even called The Italian Job "the best car commercial ever. It is having the same placement strategy in India with the ongoing Auto Expo announcing the launch of BMW Minis in India – what gorgeous timing! I feel the BMW guys financed this movie. In Europe after the launch of Italian job, Minis reported an increase in sales of 32%!

Plot:- Vinod Khanna is an old con languishing in jail who arranges the players(experts in various fields, such as illusionists, prosthetic, safe openers, explosives experts, hackers and seducers(the chicks) for Abishek’s team. They plan to steal the gold Russia is returning to Romania by train. The team has a number of double crosser, so the players have to steal the gold back all over again. Who succeeds, and who turns out what- is supposed to keep the audience rooted to their chairs in agonizing anticipation and nail biting suspense. Alas, that doesn't happen and the movie is predictable with a banal ending. The emotional angles are badly done and the players fail to convince you in their abilities to thrill you with superhuman talents.

The cast looks worn out, washed out and repetitive. Vinod is shaky on his wobbly legs and one feels Abbas Mastan may have spared him the agony of standing on his two feet and instead handed him a wheel chair. Sonam is still curvy where they couldn't liposuction her fat out in Singapore. She is totally wasted as a seductress with botox lips and silicon titties. Bips has a hard time concealing her manly voice and erection every time she sees the effeminate Abishek or Niel Nitin cuddling up to her after an overdose of viagra. Abishek, as usual looks like he is up all night changing nappies and that he could do with a hot bath and shave. Omi Vaidya looks like he is desperately waiting for a sequel to the three idiots, so that he can slip into his comfortable role of the fourth idiot. Johnny Walker pretends he has moral ascendancy over his dialogue writer and could pull in a punch if people around him got their job right. Bobby Deol looks seriously unwell and looks unhappy with his demotion to making just making cameo appearances these days.

Well, as Bollywood movies go, we are improving the quality of technical packaging; but the art of telling stories – we are yet to get there. Ok for a one time watch with a Red Bull drink- to stay alert.

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