i was absolutely delighted to watch another chopra mis adventure in manhattan , this was incomparable with rani and srk running like terrorists all over union station and i wonder how come they werent shot dead  by the security men , but then everybody in this trash was so euphoric  it was evident they were very high on some exotic yankee home made or imported substances , more then ever the charismatic sexually ambiguous youthful director karan johar who specialises in these delicately made lovely nightmares .

the movie kicked off with miss rani sitting alone on a bench in her bridal dress on her weddind day wearing all her designer jewellery having a tete -a tete with a total stranger , about the intricacies of human relationships ,unfortunately she cant elope with him so we have to endure  30 more reels of precious color stock being wasted .

anyway the stranger is a brilliant young yankee football player who doesnt even know how to cross a road  in manhattan ,so hes run over after this life threatening chat with the bride to be and we have to endure a limping srk for the rest of the movie .

if this was not enough the brides father in law turns out to be an old lecherous pervert who has nothing better to do except pass sexist comments on certain parts of female anatomy ,particularly if they happen to be middle aged and  a little overweight females [kiron kher] , who could play this role better then mr bachan himself with his austere grandeur and magnificent voice , the only omission being the target of his remarks is poor kiron rather then a certain miss rekha who would ve been perfectly cast as the middleaged playgirl encouraging him ,

meanwhile the bride turns out to be frigid ,which is understandable as the groom is bachan junior , who lives with miss frigid in a multimillion dollar apartment but have no peurto rican maids, so they have to do all the cleaning themselves wearing gucci dresses,  and also have never heard of psychiatrists in newyork where its chic to have psychotherapy for everything ,except in this case its a wife who refuses to have any physical relationship with her hubby, just a trivial matter for mr johar

srk and rani  meet again in the context of a black beast in union station again ,where rani happens to abduct srks  son in broad daylight [black beast is a  supposed child serial killer ],this is the pretext for  more crass comedy here and some other tasteless  jokes which srk cracks about fat  sikh kids in central park .
anyway the two[ limpy and frigy ]embark on a clandestine love affair[candle lit bed scenes ] and somehow their spouses meet as well[zinta and abishek ],a miracle accomplished in manhattan with 8 million people living in the tiny suburb .
after some  more embarrassing situations like a hospital ER being turned into a circus by mr johar , the affair is exposed and mr bachan sr dies as well ,
i felt more  sorry for the glassware smashed by bachan jr in a rage upon this discovery then for any one else ,what follows is some truly bad english dialogues between rani and srk over a telephone in a terrible english accent where they decide to part ways , everbody cries  including srk and rani, except for me as i was heartily laughing my head off at their english accents .

there is a very sensitively handled sex innuendo with miss rani dressed like a sado masochistic whipmistress , it actually would have been useful if she had used the lash on the crew starting from johars to bachans and srk too ,but our indian women still have a soft corner for these nincompoops .

so the two sob and go their ways but mr johar likes fairytale endings otherwise hell get insomnia and we cant afford that , [karan johar on medication ],so .....another miracle ,the two unfortunate adulterers are forgiven by their partners ,as well as 

their partners decide to bring them together very generously after 3 years ,again at union station[by now the yanks would have been sick of their faces ,iwonder why its so difficult for indians  to get an american visa ,if this goes on in big apple ,can you blame the yanks ] and miraculously SRK turns into superman by getting off a moving amtrak train , after the doors are locked and its on its way ,

how was  this trick  achieved , only  KRISH can answer the riddle ,

in the middle of all this mr limpy sings a song in yankee stadium [iwas rudely woken up from my slumber ]and theres a party too where bachan jr decides to demonstrate to us hes got two legs which cannot dance at all ,and surprise of all surprises, john abraham is the DJ , looking stoned and acting like a chimpanzee its a special appearance ,but then dont forget arjun rampal without whom this miserable party wouldnt have been the biggest hit of the year for bollywood ,hes playing the toyboy for miss zinta , someone has to console her while limpy and frigy have fun in hotel rooms ,

sorry guys no offence but the funniest scene is when srk tells rani after sleeping with her ,
your husband is a good man [sob ,sob ], your place is with him [in really bad english too ], one thing is for sure there was a dearth of glycerine in big apple after all the crocodile tears shed by the whole cast including the bachans , i pity the new yorkers ,but i think they will get immune after kal ho na ho and janemann , which are equally melodramatic and childish.

if you can make any sense out of this trash then go watch the next karan johar movie , thats your punishment .

there is no hope for bollywood as long as this trash represents it at events like  toronto film festival , yes im not jesting it was actually screened there

please excuse my excesses as i was highly amused  by watching this comic masterpiece by the cream of bollywood
cheers


NB ;
the best scene was on a pedestrian crossing as both rani and zinta walk  while srk walksstands  with a bouquet of red roses , i just regret  a drunk yank didnt run them over with a 4 wheeler to put an end to their  and our misery , or if i was in his place id give the bouquet to rani and tell zinta to get lost
thx

Plot Revealed In The Review:	No Comment
Best to watch with:	No Comment
Movie Genre:	No Comment
Best part in the movie:	No Comment