Sep 20, 2009 12:38 PM
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I’M OK – YOU’RE OK
1992 Edition, Thomas A. Harries, M.D.
Sterling Publishers Private Limited, New Delhi, 1979
Paperback, 269 pages
Are you okay? That's probably the most important question anyone will ever answer, and Dr. Thomas Harries's groundbreaking bestseller has already helped millions respond in the affirmative. I’M OK – YOU’RE OK is “the product of a search to find answers for people who are looking for hard facts in answer to their questions about how the mind operates, why we do what we do, and how we can stop doing what we do if we wish.”
Using TA, which confronts the individual with the fact that he or she is responsible for what happens in the future, Dr. Harries explained how to distinguish the three active elements that make up everyone's personality(Parent, Adult, and Child), as well as the four life positions underlying people's actions. Best of all, his theories are presented in wonderfully easy-to-understand language, and there's practical advice on how to change harmful behavior. Anyone can lead a happier, more effective life and better understand friends and family.
How to gain control of your future, no matter what has happened in the past – that is the promise Dr. Harris holds out in his well illustrated book in thirteen chapters. The author says that most people have come to accept that psychiatry is a good thing, but exactly what it is and what it does has not been made clear, especially as the words psychiatrists use seems to mean different things to different people. Dr. Harries has taken up the challenge in this book, in simple(though not simplistic) terms.
Dr. Harries says that people do not have to be mentally ill to benefit from reading his book; for it has applications in marital relations, bringing up children, understanding adolescent behavior and time management among other things. The tools at his disposal are the tools of TA. All of us are familiar with the term “childlike” behavior; the author says that the child within us reacts primarily by way of expressing emotions and feelings. As the individual matures, the adult begins to differentiate between life as it was taught to him(parental control), life as he wished it(childlike) and life as it really is. Everything that the child’s parents did and said in his early years becomes part of him. In the adult conflict arises when parental data conflicts with his desires and with reality as he perceives it.
The goal of TA is to restore to the individual his freedom of choice, the freedom to change. Most people are not even aware that they can change; it is the purpose of TA to show them how. The book explores the concept and idea that we humans act according to one of three basic ego states: Parent, Adult, or Child.
Dr. Harries believes that it's never too late to change your ego state. This book has techniques which work well on an individual, couple, or group level written in language that's easy to understand with its systematic approach which can be easily followed by people of any age group.
An excellent book and highly recommended for people who want a better understanding of themselves and others. This practical guide to TA is a unique approach to your problems. Hundreds of thousands of people have found this phenomenal breakthrough in psychotherapy a turning point in their lives. In sensible, non-technical language Thomas A Harris explains how to gain control of yourself, your relationships and your future - no matter what happened in the past.
Book Reviewed by Joy Kirt Sidhu,
HimalayaCollegeof Education, Ranwar, Karnal: 132001
