December,2000- I was in Chennai, working for a body shopping consultancy firm, one of the numerous ones, promising a job in the US of A. The company had applied for my H1 and all the necessary

documents were processed. I had got all the necessary approvals, and legal documents needed. I was informed, I did not need to go to the embassy in person. Most of my colleagues, had their passports stamped, without going there. And I was thankful, having heard many horror stories about the US consulate in Chennai. We paid all the necessary fees for TTK visas, which would then submit it to the consulate, and I dropped my application in their drop box.

Dec 7,2000- My bliss is shattered, when my HR manager informs me, that I have to go to the embassy. Seems there has been a case of many firms from Hyderabad, submitting fake CV’s and fake documents. I grit my teeth and curse the place under my breath. Though am an Andhraite myself, I can’t get away from the basic truth, that Hyderabad is the  Fraud  documents capital of India. In fact so bad was the situation there, that for a sum of money, you could even get a fake H1B visa looking just like the real thing. Anyway I knew that all the cursing and swearing, would not help me in any way. And I was prepared in a way, the Jews were I guess when they were being loaded into the Nazi’s cattle trains.

Dec 11,2000- The D-Day comes. I had spent a sleepless night before at my mansion in Triplicane. Now before you jump to conclusions, mansions in Triplicane, are nothing more than bachelor quarters, with rooms having the bare necessities of life. Caught an auto to the place at around 4 A.M in morning. Arrived at the US consulate, only to find a queue already in place. Families sleeping on the sidewalk, anxious applicants coming from Hyderabad, Bangalore and other places clutching their documents their bags in tow, married people with kids, looking like a total melee.

Around 9 AM- We were allowed into the Consulate premises, nothing is allowed inside, and anyway since those were my pre mobile days, did not have much except my documents. To quote Oscar Wilde “I have nothing to declare, except my wit”.  After paying the requisite fees, at the third window after all my documents were checked, was given a token, and asked to wait my turn. So far, so good.
And now began the real test. If some one wants to write a book on “The Art of being Patient and Cool”, I suggest they spend some time in the US Consulate at Chennai. To call it a test of your patience would be an understatement. In a way my waiting time was a blessing in disguise I guess, because I formulated some new theories.

Random Theory of Token Numbers: Your getting called to take your place in the Queue to appear before the officer, has nothing to do with your token number. It’s all random. So you could have token number 10 and the person next to you would have token number 1000, but don’t be surprised if  he gets the first call. Now why is a person with higher token number called, here even God would be hard pressed to give an answer.

AFU: Your documents are in order, you have genuine experience letters, everything is correct. Yet you could hear the officer saying, that your documents have been referred to AFU. What’s that? Anti Fraud Unit. What happens when it goes there? Well the query is that you will get to know after 2 weeks. In truth, you can kiss your US visa goodbye. Again why does it go there, when everything is fine. Don’t know, for all I know, the guy might have caught his girl sneaking out with some one else, and decided that “All the world is a fraud” or the female might have found her hubby/boyfriend doing a Bill Clinton-Monica Lewinsky. The day I was in the consulate, I found a record 40-50 applications, being rejected, and before you start going “Oh must be Hyderabad”, well no it was an eclectic mix of cities, and some of them had worked abroad too. Better name for this  All F***ked Up.

All around me, I could see people with anxiety writ on their faces. Not all were going there for a few dollars more. Many elderly people eager to see their sons/daughters settled abroad, some parents going there for their daughter’s delivery, some wanting to visit their relatives. There were some priests too. I had heard that priests were in demand in US to perform rituals. But considering the way the officials at the Chennai consulate behave, maybe we need our own exorcists to knock some sense into them.

Sitting in the room, was a torture. Except biscuits and  some snacks, nothing was there to eat. The TV  continuously kept on showing BBC. At the other end, I could see the Masters/Mistresses of the ring, treating the applicants with contempt, derision and ridicule. Nothing different from our Government offices.  Americans  wonder why people all over the world hate their country so much. Maybe next time they spend some time in the US consulate in Chennai, they could understand.  No transparency, people treated rudely, careless staff, if this is the image they want to project to the world, good luck.

It was around 2 PM afternoon now. I was at the edge of my patience now, and my nerves were fraying. I had been there for close to 7 hours, was without sleep for the past 12 hours, and hungry, thirsty, and the worst part is I did not have a goddamn clue, what was happening. I envied the people, who had left earlier, when their applications were rejected. At least they got a bullet right in their heads, this was slow poisoning, torture at it’s worst. I cared a damn about my Visa, even if it got rejected, I just wanted to get the hell out of this place. I would rather slug it out in the Chennai heat and humidity, than suffer this. And finally I got my call. Fortunately, it was not the Lady Terminator, who summarily rejected people. I was questioned on my qualification, job and pay. And then I heard the words “Ok please go and pay the amount”. Whew, was my reaction. Yep I finally got the H1 in my passport, but was it really worth all this mental torture.

It’s another matter, that I never made it to US, inspite of having H1, but that’s a different story altogether. Now even if i dont recommend this, it wouldnt make much difference, because this is something we still have to go, especially if we are in South. This is just for people to be prepared for worst.

How many times have you visited tis consulate/embassy:

Only once