For most part of our life, we are comparing ourselves against others. For me, it brought out more frustration than anything. I never had the grades my brother got at school.
I never excelled in sports, academics, extra curricular...I used to wonder how can some people do a few things so well that others can't?
"You have the same five senses, same physical attributes - you too can!"
Hah! What a great thought. But that made me use all my resources to become something which makes me feel challenged.

Even if I achieve it at the end of the day, is it worth all the turmoil? Won't I better do what I can and what makes me happy? I don't have anything against those who achieve the best in life, are leaders in their fields, have won heaps of accolades. WOW! GREAT! But maybe its the lack of ambition, maybe its plain laziness, my laid-back attitude or maybe...I don't know.
 
I am happy. Thats it. I don't need your degrees, your awards, your accolades...They don't mean much to me. Even at work, the best moments for me are when my work is appreciated and I am told that I am an asset. At home, if my wife says I am a pretty good husband and I am performing my basic responsibilities, I am done. There is no limit to how much I can do and should do. But is life just that - straining yourself so much and still feeling half content?

Here too on MS, there are many many instances, when I look at a profile and think about that person and go weak in my knees...No way can i ever be like him/her - I tell myself.
That self pity which engulfs you at the thought of your current state which stares you in your face...Does that do us any good?

I am happy to say that for a long time now, I have been able to shrug off that empty feeling of having everything yet wondering what I could have had...No, I am not hinting at complacency...But if we really want do a reality check, we need to check how we are doing with the resources we have. My happiness matters to me. My family's happiness matters to me. Some of my close friends' happiness matters to me. If all of us are happy doing whatever makes us happy, what else do we need?

I recall that song written by Sahir Ludhianvi from that old Amitabh starrer 'Zameer':

Tum bhi chalo, hum bhi chalein
Chalti rahe Zindagi..
Na zameen manzil, naa aasmaan
Zindagi hai..Zindagi..

The wedding season is on. I was witness to one recently and would be witness to one in the coming week. Ravi Dutt Goel (ravidutt of MS) got married last sunday. The venue was a posh banquet in North West Delhi. To me, Ravi isn't just an MSian. I have known him through Rohit for a little more than a year now. And I would say that if hearts meet and frequencies match you don't need time to know that you are friends for life. Thats what happened with me and Ravi too. For more details, read Rohit's recent review on trusted circle.

Anyways, coming back to Ravi's wedding. Last sunday, 3rd Feb, Ravi tied knot with his life partner Honey. For more details, contact Ravi personally or over M2M. If you didn't get the invitations, I would say, you were not alert to sense that. If you did, and did not attend, let Ravi return from the avalanche of events that has hit him recently just as it hits any normal young man on the verge of getting married. And for those, who got the invitation and did attend, it was a night to remember.

Three MSians graced the occasion. You must have already guessed the two. Who was the third? Any guesses? Well, to start off, the poor guy had the misfortune of being left alone in the city by his wife. She was travelling and could not return in time to allow him to grace the ceremoney as a couple.A little upset, a little confused, he called me up sometimes during the afternoon on the wedding day.
"What do I do man? It doesn't feel good gracing the occasion without a wife if the whole world knows you've one. What do you suggest?"
I told the poor guy to come down without any second thoughts as we were there to give him company if his wife wasn't available. Of course we were no replacement for a wife, but at least we could make him feel happy.

Ravi wanted us to be at his residence by 6 pm to be a part of the baaraat. But Rohit had reached Delhi same day from Mumbai, that too 2 hours late by Rajdhani Exp. And it was a shivering cloudy day. Rohit, his another very old friend from Noida(also Ravi's old friend) and I started with our respective families around 7.40 pm. We drove past the DND flyway and straight on ring road. After a lot of U turns and asking the people around , we finally reached.

The guy without the wife too reached around the same time. We met. There was loud music being played by the DJ. Gone are the days of shehnai. Anyways, we should move with times. Our kids instantly took to the dance floors while we waited patiently for the groom to arrive. We ate all that was served to us - right from aloo tikkis to gol gappes to sherbets to pakodas to rabris to fruit salad...I mean you name it, they had it and we ate it!

Time passed. Groom did arrive. Albeit a little late. Anyway, you can never fault him. If he had his way, he would have never reached the venue. But his entire group of family and well wishers accompanied him. Amidst a lot of 'Hum aapke hain kaun' rituals fast forwarded, the rituals took place. We waved and smiled at him to let him to know that we were there. He too smiled back. I must say he looked a lot more relaxed and composed than many of us who have been through the same nightmare. Poor guy. We had to leave earlier than we had thought we would. It was getting late, the kids were getting sleepy and we had long distance to drive back. We wanted to abscond without informing him but we thought it would be ditching him. So, we somehow pleaded, requested and demanded that we take his leave. He let us go but with a condition attached. Will let you know that later.

We returned via the same route. The guy without a wife drove alone. I expected him to do that exactly. Weddings are bad places to be if you are single. Anyone can take you for a ride or ask for a lift. But the guy without the wife didn't fall in the trap. I am witness to the fact that he did drive back all alone.

It was a night to remember. We felt happy for Ravi. And we felt happy to be a part of his happiness. Hum ek baar jeete hain. Ek baar marte hain, shaadi bhi ek baar hoti hai. To jaana tha naa yaar! Aur gaye!

Those who are still wondering who the third guy was, please make guesses and I will let you know!

(Also, await the pics!)

Trivia:

Guys, as you can see, this diary post's URL is: http://www.mouthshut.com/diary
/readpost.php?postid=189. That means this is the 189th diary written on MS ever since its inception, till date.

You can start copy pasting this URL in your browser and change the postid = x ( x =>1, i.e. postid=1 was first diary, postid=2 was second and so on.) Try it. Read all the diaries you may have missed. Have fun!

This is an excerpt from Nobel Prize lecture of

Orhan Pamuk
The Nobel Prize in Literature 2006

The entire speech is available here..
ht
tp://nobelprize.org/nobel_prize
s/literature/laureates/2006/pam
uk-lecture_en.html

"....
Let me change the mood with a few sweet words that will, I hope, serve as well as that music. As you know, the question we writers are asked most often, the favourite question, is;why do you write?I write because I have an innate need to write! I write because I can't do normal work like other people. I write because I want to read books like the ones I write. I write because I am angry at all of you, angry at everyone. I write because I love sitting in a room all day writing. I write because I can only partake in real life by changing it. I write because I want others, all of us, the whole world, to know what sort of life we lived, and continue to live, in Istanbul, in Turkey. I write because I love the smell of paper, pen, and ink. I write because I believe in literature, in the art of the novel, more than I believe in anything else. I write because it is a habit, a passion. I write because I am afraid of being forgotten. I write because I like the glory and interest that writing brings. I write to be alone. Perhaps I write because I hope to understand why I am so very, very angry at all of you, so very, very angry at everyone. I write because I like to be read. I write because once I have begun a novel, an essay, a page, I want to finish it. I write because everyone expects me to write. I write because I have a childish belief in the immortality of libraries, and in the way my books sit on the shelf. I write because it is exciting to turn all of life's beauties and riches into words. I write not to tell a story, but to compose a story. I write because I wish to escape from the foreboding that there is a place I must go but – just as in a dream – I can't quite get there. I write because I have never managed to be happy. I write to be happy...."

I asked many celebs what they felt about the new look MS and here is what they have to say:

Rakhi Sawant: "Oh my god! I love this MS look. Ekdum bindaas. By God promise. Per Main Faisal ko boloongi ki gift real real hone chahiye. Ye cheating hai. Main insaaf chahti hoon."

Mahesh Bhatt: "Its homo sapiens' ultimate philanthropy to modern pyschology which thrives on sycophantic philosophy."

SRK: "Heyyyy..haaannnn...hmmmmmmm.. I love MMMMMMMMM MS. MS is the best. After me. Muah Muah Muah.."

Saif: "WOWW!!! WOWW!! Superb yaar. Fantastic. I am sure Kareena would love this. I will gift her everything from here only."

Dharam paaji: "Kutte...Kameene...main tere points pee jaaoonga..dushman se badla lekar rahoonga..lekar rahoonga..lekar rahoonga...When I write, why does everyone goes missing...and missing...and missing...and missing? :( .."