Now that most of the glitches have been set right and things are running smoothly, I decided to check my online savings account with MS Bank. Like, Uncle Scrooge it’s an exercise I take great pleasure in. The only hitch is that I can’t dive into my virtual bank balance.

Boy, was I glad I checked my balance! The first thing that struck me when I scrutinised my bank statement was that I could afford to buy anything in the MS Mart, yes, literally anything. I had, initially, planned to buy a Beach Villa but when I realised I could buy the Private Aeroplane I was more than a little tempted to do so.

But then, having my bheja fried by the summer heat, some Krazy4 thoughts entered my delirious mind, and I started imagining things…

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First, if I bought myself an aeroplane I would become the first man to explore the uncharted skies of MS…. A sort of Vijay Mallya on MS. Just then, a naughty thought entered my mind… I’d also break FE dada’s heart. Now, how good or bad is that? Bolo bolo :)

To appease FE dada, I will name it OMfisher airlines. I could serve OM with his Orkut avatar emblazoned on the glasses with probably a short message from dada himself on Nicotine intake, inscribed below for good measure. I am sure dada will be OverwhelMed. And if dada permits, I could also serve kwel Fosters’ of course, with a written consent from Kweldebbs. Doc. Sudipto33 will be requested to be at hand for those who drink like a fish but have no bladder control. In addition, I could also make available for reading specially recommended books by Smits of Chintu25 fame. I could rope in Reviewer Shanti for providing brief reviews on the books for those who don’t care to read the whole book.

Now that drinks and books have been taken care of, it’s time to look at the menu. Our SkyChef Aaryesdee will be in charge of the pantry. He will bring with him all exotic recipes to tickle the taste buds (and tummies) of the passengers. Mouth watering chocolates and sweets will be served by Sweetsdesire.

In house movies, specially selected by Paul and Ipsita, will be screened which will, among others, include unreleased and unimagined flicks. Indian1969 will provide expert comments at the beginning, and voiceover during the course of the movie.

Since it’s a private jet, I am toying with the idea of presenting to my handpicked passengers a glimpse of the African Zulu War dance exclusively by Zuludancer, Adi bhai. In addition to that, Vee could be coaxed to walk the ramp half-naked displaying his strategically placed tattoos.

Astrofreak

, Tanna would be there to come up with her individual astrological predictions for the passengers… needless to say, most would be interested in knowing whether the plane would land safely in one piece. On learning who the pilot is, they’d prefer to pray instead of depending on ‘freaky’ predictions. In case of emergency, and feeling of suffocation, oxygen will be freely provided by shefalioxygen. Though the jet is capable of smoothly cutting through stormy weather and unrelenting thunder, as a precautionary measure, Spikeguard will be roped in to prevent any power outages.

On board security will be provided by Spy009 (Seraj). Passengers in depression, and depressing passengers, will be counselled during the flight by Psyched. Rohitthebest will monitor ‘first’ flights in the day. Night flights will be in the safe hands of Kalyaniraat.

On flight duty free shop will be well-stocked (courtesy MS Mart). There will be, apart from the usual stuff, tickles, pokes, pinches, slaps, punches, and kicks, for the amusement of discerning passengers. There will also be some exotic items like bikinis, kiss me’s and diamond studded platinum "Will you marry me" rings for passengers who carry their hearts on their sleeves.

Payal will present her usual inspiring thoughts for the day (you might need them). Vyzz_kid (Vyoma) will baby sit any naughty kids, in flight, who want to go outside and play. I might contact Madhurie for the air hostess job, in her spare time she can attend to complaints, if any, from the passengers and also fight for their rights. Swan (Swati) would also be invited to recite patriotic poetry in Hindi with a swan song to culminate the proceedings, by which time the plane would be ready to land.

All members who haven’t written a review as yet will be handpicked by me as passengers.

Ah! I forgot to give you the most important info… the jet will be piloted by FE junior2.

~mbf~